In a Sex Positive World, Sex Work is Not a Crime

Sex Positive World 1People often ask me why sex work shouldn’t be a crime.  They tell me it’s dangerous, that they think it’s disgusting or humiliating, and that they wouldn’t want their children doing it. They say that it’s degrading to women, that nobody really chooses to do it, and that it has negative effects on society.  Sometimes they even tell me that sex is special, that a woman is spiritually damaged by being paid for it, or that sex work is against their religion.  They say a lot of things, and yet they can never explain why having sex for one certain reason is worse than having it for other reasons.

When you say that sex work should be a crime, what you’re saying is that a certain motive, a specific thought in a person’s mind, can make a good act into an evil one.  According to current laws, it’s perfectly alright if I have sex with someone for love, or to have babies, or for fun, or for friendship.  But if I have it because I’ve got bills to pay, that idea in my mind makes the sex so dangerous the state has the right to send armed men to stop me and lock me in a cage.   Continue reading

Worth Revisiting

I’m remembering that I did have an experience where I stuck up for myself as a woman in public. I was very surprised at the results. I had just arrived at a restaurant on my bicycle and was locking it up. I had to bend over to lock my bike. As I was finishing that action, a man coasted up to me on his bike and propositioned me. I looked him in the eye and said, “That didn’t feel good the way you said that.” I was surprised at how quickly he apologized and how ashamed he felt of himself. I learned in that split second how powerful it can be to speak the truth in moments like this.

From an interview with Jean Franzblau by Celia Waddell in January 2015.

 

 

In A Sex Positive World, Sex Nourishes Relationships

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Photo by Vicki Nunn, public domain.

Three years ago, I took my sweetie to a local “friendly neighborhood sex store.” It was for a workshop on his birthday. The topic was “G-Spot and Female Ejaculation.” It included a live demo. This was something my sweetie was very much interested in. The evening ended up drawing us closer, because it was something we shared together. (Sitting in the front row during the demo also helped.)

We had discussed female ejaculation on various occasions, so I knew it was a major turn-on for him. If we had been sex-negative, there is no way we would’ve felt comfortable discussing our sexual likes or dislikes.

I’ve found that when I’m interacting with another sex-positive person, we can talk freely about what we enjoy and want to try. This sexy discourse helps me to feel close to my partner.

What also makes sex a bonding experience for me is that there’s no hiding, shame, secrets or guilt. Instead, there’s an openness and innocence. We enjoy being in each other’s presence as we explore each other’s bodies. Continue reading

Volunteers for CSPC Photo Booth at SEAF

WANTED:  Volunteers to help with the CSPC Photo Booth at the upcoming Seattle Erotic Art Festival.

We’re scheduling volunteers for evening shifts Friday 4/22 and Saturday 4/23. Grab a companion and volunteer as a team.  You and your team will have the opportunity to enjoy the day at Seattle’s biggest erotic art show – for FREE!  Volunteering at Seattle Erotic Art Festival is an excellent way to have time savoring the benefits of your efforts. Volunteers should be CSPC members and feel comfortable talking to the public. Dress-up, dress down, and costumes are encouraged. Familiarity with a Nikon DSLR camera is a plus. Experience posing people for portraits is a double plus.  All volunteers must attend a 15 minute training so they can help clients enter their email address in the computer. Contact SEAF2016PhotoBooth@gmail.com for information.

NCSF Consent Summit

National Coalition for Sexual Freedom Consent Summit

Saturday, April 23rd
10:00 – 6:00 in the Main Space (1602 15th Avenue West)

Attitudes are changing about consent, and it’s time to join in the conversation! Come join us for an all-day event of workshops and discussions on consent.

Tristan Taormino will give the Keynote at the Luncheon. Tristan Taormino is an award-winning writer, sex educator, speaker, filmmaker, and radio host. She is the editor of 25 anthologies and author of eight books, including The Ultimate Guide to Kink and The Feminist Porn Book: The Politics of Producing Pleasure. As the head of Smart Ass Productions, she has directed and produced twenty-four sex educational and erotic films. She is the host of Sex Out Loud, a weekly radio show on the VoiceAmerica Network.

Along with Tristan, other experts include Judge Rudy Serra, and Kitty Stryker will headline the Panel Discussions and workshops:

  • Consent & the Law
  • Consent Activism: Past, Present and Future
  • Affirmative Action and College Campuses
  • Negotiation & Consent
  • Consent in Power Exchange RelationshipsTrain the Trainers: How to educate about consent

All tickets include Seattle Erotic Arts Festival admission on Sunday & Weekend Pass Promotion Code for 15% off.  This is going to be an amazing event — buy tickets here.

Sponsored by the Seattle Erotic Arts Festival and the Foundation and Center for Sex-Positive Culture

In a Sex Positive World, Sex Can Promote Spiritual Growth

Mooladhara

Mooladhara by Skangel99 on Wikimedia Commons. Shared under Creative Commons 3.0.

We can be our own obstacles for creating change in our lives.

The hamster in our brain chatters, nonstop sometimes. It says, “I am not good enough,” “no one loves me,” and things as simple as “what trouble are the kids up to now.” The hamster wheel repeats the patterns over and over in our mind.

During sexual experiences, the voices stop. We step away from our mundane lives. We enter into an altered state of consciousness. In that moment, we open ourselves to an experience greater than ourselves. Continue reading

Thanks

Thanks to Dan Savage for the shout-out in his Savage Love column:

I’m a huge fan of Seattle’s Center for Sex Positive Culture (thecspc.org). And I’m an even bigger fan of people getting out there, meeting up IRL, and making face-to-face connections with like-minded kinksters. I’m such a big fan that I’m going to pick up the expense of your first year’s membership at the Center for Sex Positive Culture. While there are additional charges for most events at the center, POWER, there are also tons of volunteer opportunities—and there’s no better way to get to know the local kinksters than to pitch in and help out.

In a Sex Positive World, Sex is Fun!

Funtoys_vibrators_byfunfactory2In a sex positive world sex is fun! I mean like super fun!

I was 16 years old when I lost my “v-card”. I remember thinking afterwards, “This is it? This what everyone is all excited about?”

A year later when I had my first orgasm that I didn’t give to myself late at night after everyone went to sleep, I was sold. This was what sex was all about for me. Getting off, screaming, moaning, laughing and romping about.

The first time I saw people having sex in front of me was when I first joined the Center. Continue reading