In a Sex Positive World

So, imagine you’re a teenage virgin in Kansas City in the 1980s. Everyone talks about how hot David Lee Roth is and how Reagan is going to save the world.  

Sex happens, but you never see it. It happens in secret, in the dark. It happens in the backseats of cars, in closets, always behind parents’ backs, and, on one memorable occasion, under a pool table in a puddle of spilled beer. You’re hot and bothered, but you never go all the way. Maybe you think sex is icky. Maybe your parents would kick you out if you were sexually active.  Maybe if you went all the way people would call you a slut. But if you’re a virgin, you’re called a prude. Continue reading

Worth Revisiting

A brief excerpt from “Perseverance and Personality and Principles”, by Allena Gabosch, originally posted May 29th, 2012

How do individuals and organizations stay principled?

  • We live in integrity. When we say we’re going to do something, we do it. When we screw up, we clean up the mess and get back in integrity.
  • We take responsibility for our actions.
  • We respect ourselves and others. We respect their opinions and do so without compromising ourselves.
  • We are open to change, but we don’t let go of our values.

Continue reading

Member News

Building Project Plans:

We recently saw a notice go up for the approval of a building project plans. We contacted the property owners on 1/21 and they told us there is no offer on the property at this time. As an organization we had already decided that looking for a new property (that is a better fit to our long-term needs) is in our community’s best interest. Our lease ends in 2018. Even if an offer were to come in the near future, we are legally protected with a generous amount of notice required before our lease could be ended early.

If you would like more information about the proposed project for this space you can find it here:

If you’d like to give input about what we should be looking for in another space, please fill out our long-term goals survey.

Shower Remodel: Continue reading

Stepping Stones to Sex Positivity

Stepping stones at the River RothayI had just been through a heart-wrenching breakup with my girlfriend. I was pretty mopey. My wife was very supportive, but she was tired of hearing about it.

That was a story I couldn’t tell around the water cooler. It was 2010, and except for the first few years of my marriage, I had been non-monogamous all my life. When I married my wife nearly 30 years ago, the term “polyamory” hadn’t even been coined yet. We were just “open.” But not “out.” The end of an important relationship that I couldn’t talk about with anyone but my partner – well, it made me realize I needed something I never had before: a community.

When I found the CSPC, I knew no one, and felt like I knew nothing. I was an introvert and found it hard to talk to people. One of the first things I did was find other members just as new and curious as I was. We went to parties together, and met long-standing members of the community.   Continue reading

Volunteer Orientation January 13th

Happy 2016! The Center for Sex Positive Culture is bustling with activities and events seven days a week. Just check out our Event Calendar for details. Member volunteers are actively planning special events for you, and you can join their ranks!

Volunteers receive great experience planning and running events, and helping with office work, orientations, outreach, or facilities. Running an event isn’t your speed? Try laundry detail, food preparation, or set-up. Or maybe you have a particular skill-set and imagine how you can contribute that to the Center. Attend the next Volunteer Orientation Wednesday, January 13th, from 7:30 – 9:00 pm in the Annex.

Volunteer benefits include getting to know people in the community, stretching your skills, and free entry into the events you volunteer for, before or after your shift. Learn about more perks, the community of volunteers, and how you can get involved at the Orientation.

Monday Madness, Every Monday at 7

Where Everybody Knows Your Name! Cheers CSPC style!

Where: Main Space
When: 7pm-Midnight
Who: 18+. Members and invited guests only.
Cost: $10 (guests $20)

Monday Madness welcomes you to our family! The party is filled with an amazing group of regulars who are open to sharing their extensive knowledge and socializing in our very laid back style. There’s plenty of room to spread out and have intimate long scenes. A great place to meet others, sit back, relax, and watch some incredible scenes.
You can hear over the music and see who you are talking to. Volunteers and staff often attend Monday Madness! We allow any play sanctioned by the Center.

Ethereal Embrace Thursday 1/14 at 9pm

Ethereal Embrace invites you to explore intimacy and connection without a physical focus.

Who: CSPC Members and Invited Guests Only
Cost: Member Price: $15, Guest Price: $25
When: Every 3 months on the 2nd Thursday, 9pm – 12:30am
Where: Main Space

Ethereal Embrace invites you to step outside the box, share your mind and emotions with another, and explore ways to cultivate intimacy that aren’t physically focused. In particular, we challenge you to set aside sex, physical pain, and cuddles for an evening, experimenting instead with other ways to develop and express closeness with another person. Whether that’s sharing a dream with a stranger, or being forbidden to speak on a leash by your Master’s side – or anything in between – we’d love to see what connects your minds and hearts, when you’re not connecting your bodies.

Here are some of our favorites, for those of you looking for inspiration (though we’d be happy to get inspiration from you, too):



*Behavior training

*Mental bondage

*Intimate discussions or negotiations

Please note that Ethereal Embrace is one of three quarterly parties that cater to the asexual demographic and to those who​ are uncomfortable being around traditional expressions of sex. We ask that you be respectful and cognizant of that and refrain from overt sexual behavior, even if you’re incorporating nonphysical connection.

If you have questions about whether the play you’d like to do fits with the energy of our party, please contact us at

Happy New Year!

Good Day!

The New Year is almost upon us and we are going out with a bang (or maybe a slap, and punch and a smack and . . . ).  Join us New Year’s Eve and then come back the next day for more parties to start 2016 out right!  We’re partying all week long.

I want to give a shameless plug for my Workshop Intensive on Sex,  Relationship and Intimacy coming up in January.  Nekole Shapiro and I are very excited about our first weekend long workshop January 16&17More info here.

I’ll see you next year!