by Skitty

Velvet dress? Check

Fishnets and boots? Check

KN95? Check

Negative rapid test? Check

Why do I test? So I can get laid. And so you can get laid too. It’s that simple. Well, maybe not quite that simple. I can get laid at home. But home isn’t a sex dungeon and it’s not filled with all my friends and lovers and possible new connections.

As CSPC president, I need to engage with people. I need to volunteer within the community.

I test for COVID before every CSPC event. In fact, I test before every date, social outing, and trip. Despite my natural instinct to stay home and nest, I have rather a busy schedule, typically with multiple outings in a week.

So, I test. I test because I need to protect my polycule. I think of it as an extension of our safer sex practices. Sometimes it’s a bother, but it helps keep us all safer and allows us the freedom to explore new experiences, both within and outside our “cule.”

I test because I have no time to be sick. I have responsibilities. And I’d prefer not to die. If my test were to come back positive, I would be able to get treatment much sooner.

I test out of respect for myself and for others. By testing before each event, I can maintain my boundaries, knowing that those I play with are doing the same. We can choose to exchange fluids, breathe each other in, and have a damn good time with reduced risk of making one another ill.

I test because this is my community, my family, and I have a responsibility to your health as well as mine. Testing allows me to proceed with confidence. There is much less likelihood that I will infect others.

I test to do my part to keep our volunteer team from becoming sick. Because we enjoy one another’s company, we spend a lot of time together, and while that is great, it means that it doesn’t take long for the virus to pass between us. If too many volunteers are out sick at any given time, that would mean we wouldn’t be able to safely staff our events and would need to cancel. Oh, the horror!

So here we are, two and a half years into the pandemic, and I am still COVID free. I’m not sure whether it is luck or because of consistent adherence to practice. I’m betting it's a combination of both. That, and being selective by avoiding interactions that do not mean as much to me. If you see me at an event, it is because I have assessed the risk and decided you’re worth it.

I believe that getting boosted and wearing a well-fitting mask any time I am out in public have also been key components in staying COVID free. I also enjoy the side benefit of not having had a single cold or flu in the past two and a half years.

So go ahead, put on your slutwear, grab a mask, and do a rapid test (free tests are still available from WA state). Then come get laid.