by Turtle
Trigger Warning: mild mention of heavier fetishes
It's Saturday night and all the Tops have their huge bags of toys that they wheel in in giant suitcases and toolboxes. The fun is about to begin. I can't wait.
There are things people never told me though. I would show up in my fancy clothes and enjoy a hot and heavy scene fairly quickly. When I started practicing BDSM years ago, generally a scene was 30 minutes of flogging. Then, hot and sweaty, I’d collapse to the cold concrete floor, spaced out.
When I began to recover, I had to pull the same clothes back on. Oh, and that’s a big NO to putting back on those four-inch heels! They were not comfortable. Parts of my body had swollen from the scene. My makeup smeared in tear marks down my face.
I'm altered from playing. I needed to recover, and I didn't bring anything to help myself do that.
I saw other bottoms change into pajamas and sweatshirts for the rest of the party. This seemed like the best idea ever to my scattered perception! So, I picked up a backpack and made myself an Aftercare Bag.
Initially, this had very basic items in it. It consisted of soft, loose clothing (including flat shoes) to change into, a water bottle, a snack, and a book. This works in a pinch but as you change how you play and what the activities are, you should expand your bag.
I added first aid supplies like alcohol wipes, gauze, blood stop, an instant ice pack, and athletic tape as I got more into blood play. I started bringing my own tarp, my own sheet (not white), a towel, a garbage bag for wet items, a travel bottle of body wash, and a brush for when I played at other venues. I am pretty fanatical about making sure anything with blood on it goes home with me.
I started including a backup of one-day’s meds in case I stayed somewhere else. The harder I played, the more I required recovery items. It felt like I was limited in scene length.
I finally learned through experimentation that I could play a much longer scene if I used those recovery items during the scene. Drinking water, a tiny snack, an inhaler, and a better check in process meant my scene didn't go straight to Safeword.
I became a heavy bottom with time. Everyone will find their own set point. I realized that I was putting deep levels of trust in whomever I was playing with. Did I know whether their toys and rope were adequately sanitized for my use? Then, a wood toy got blood on it, and the Top gifted it to me as it was now fluid-bonded to me. I gradually obtained my own toys to be used on me by others, including items most likely to become fluid bonded (usually blood) in the process of playing. I now have quite a few paddles, knives, and machetes, and a few farm/kitchen implements in my bag. The Top should ask your consent as to which toys are on the menu for the evening, to be sure about how they are used and that you are up to it. Most people have that favorite implement that's so awesome but is so banging you can only use it sparingly.
As I get older, sometimes I deal with PTSD or being over-stimulated. I added headphones, earplugs, and a comfort item like a small blanket or stuffie. I also have a list of meds, conditions, allergies, etc. that I carry with me just in case an emergency occurs.
Don't forget your favorite lube, condoms, dental dams, and sex toys! I also bring a roll of saran wrap. You just never know what might happen for the fun of it! I have a small bag I call my Vagina Bag! Fun things for vagina owners just in case I decide to let my fingers do the walking and give some digital orgasms!
It may seem like I'm carrying a lot but it's all divided into specific bags that I take with me based on my planned activities for that evening.
I cannot even begin to explain the comfort of a super soft throw blanket against my raw bruises. All of these items get used regularly and have greatly improved my scene experiences. I hope the idea of a Bottom Bag does the same for you!
