by Emma Atkinson and Rachel Drake
Hello lovely readers! Can you believe that life seems to be heading to some variation of normal? We’ve been enjoying hugs (and more!) that were deferred in the interest of good health. Of course, we’re all the gatekeepers of what’s appropriate for our own health and safety.
In the prior newsletter we posed a question: how do you know when it’s time to acknowledge a consent issue? Remember that we’re not talking about clear steps over the line: something done that was expressly banned, or not honoring safewords (prearranged signals to pause or stop activities). We’re talking about when you have feelings that seem uncomfortable and you’re not clear on how to interpret them. You know that something’s not quite right, but you don’t know what it is. And, we’ve talked before about how unexpected feelings can come up in consensual activities.
The good news is that we have an answer to that question. Yay! Our answer is that only you can make the call about what those nagging feelings represent. You can bring in a friend or trusted advisor to get clarity. You can meditate or take a walk if that helps. You can Google it - we’re big fans of whatever works.
The better news is that the answer is simple, but admittedly not always easy. Our advice is to make friends with those feelings, and gently inquire about what they’re trying to tell you. Give those feelings a hug (if they’re huggable) and thank them for their service. They’re showing up to help you. They might be alerting you to something that needs a discussion with others. They might be asking you to resolve an issue for yourself. You’ll find the wisdom and strength to do what’s next for you.
Homework: No homework! Please let your sexy self enjoy this beautiful summer weather.
Please share your joy with us at: info@thecspc.org.
“Be excellent to each other” - Bill and Ted
“Be sexcellent to each other” - Emma and Rachel