By Emma Atkinson
Hello lovely readers! Welcome back to the corner where we’re all about the ins and outs of consent. Where consent discussions happen, you know that good times are likely to be in your future.
We’ve been pondering Planned Parenthood’s FRIES model of consent. We’re now looking at the I in FRIES, and that means that good consent is Informed consent.
You’ve no doubt been advised in numerous contexts to know yourself. It’s good advice, and we’re echoing it here. Who are you? What satisfies you in body, mind, and spirit? What’s the meaning of life? No reason for that question, just curious.
You’re also well advised to learn whatever you can about potential partners. Ask questions of those people and listen closely to their answers. Ask questions of people who know your potential partners too, and listen carefully to what they say. Put on your explorer hat and do your due diligence.
Remember that unexpected and uncomfortable feelings can arise at any time. You have the right to pause any and all interactions when you need to—remember, that’s the Reversible part of the consent model. You may have gathered what you consider to be all relevant information and still be blindsided by unexpected and uncomfortable feelings. We’re human, stuff happens, and we get to figure it out. As a friend so aptly put it, it’s another fucking opportunity for growth. Yay, right?
Homework: Have you determined the meaning of life? Please share it at: info@thecspc.org.
“Be excellent to each other.” —Bill and Ted
“Be sexcellent to each other.” —Emma