Double Dose of The Frolic: Personal Reflection

By Bill

In summer of ‘22, the CSPC had two Frolics. I went to both.

I’ve said before, I’d love to see the CSPC educate the entire world and bring everyone around to this consent-based, inclusive, and sex-positive worldview. At The Frolic, I experienced a microcosm of that as a reality.

For several days, I wake up and it isn’t a dream or memory of last night’s amazing event that I keep quiet about to most of the people I know. The amazing is still happening, and 100% of these wonderful people are on a similar journey. Experientially, it feels like the whole world because everyone I see for days shares this general worldview that supports inclusive, safe, sex-positive exploration. It felt so liberating to stay in this community and headspace, to keep making friends, bonding, exploring, learning about myself and others.

I’m pretty new to so much here. A few years ago my wife and I read The Ethical Slut and slowly opened into CNM (consensual non-monogamy). I’d never explored kink, except in my secret porn stash and my mind—never with a real person. But my biggest issue was being shy and barely able to talk about sex with anyone. Even with my partner of 15 years, I’d been guessing what she wanted and didn’t want, instead of asking and talking.

The CSPC has been a great discovery. Such wonderful and aware people!

The food at The Frolic was delicious. The classes were great. The discussion about communication I had with Eirikah and her discussion cards probably helped me the most. The negotiations with myself and the conversations I had at The Frolic were so great for me. I played “Never Have I Ever” around the bonfire and talked with everyone late into the night about experiences and where we’re each at on our journeys. We played strip Uno in the afternoon. I learned so much and practiced being bolder. More layers of shame evaporated in the sun, just slid away, baptized by the lube slip ‘n’ slide. When it was time for monitor duty, I realized I’d been nude so long that I’d lost my shorts. I finally found them, and then it felt like a great honor to help make it safe for a friend to experience an emotionally cleansing scene in space held by trusted community.

There’s something that happens to me when I’m with others and we’re all facing down our fears and exceeding society’s limits to find out who we each truly are. It builds a feeling of deep connection. Maybe because we’re all supporting each other’s honest and deeper connection to ourselves, but it’s more than that. I’m not a good enough writer to express all that happened inside of me. Personal, and simultaneously community. Self-actualization is a name for it, I guess, and at The Frolic, that is extended over time and amplified by nature.

Great medicine. It was amazing. I made many friends, used up all my summer spoons, then came home and treated my family even better than before.

I will remember…

Note: As a member of the CSPC community who is careful about privacy, I have explicit permission from everyone mentioned in this piece to use their names and any potentially identifiable scene details.