Community Matters: Possible Price Increase and Volunteer Training

Board Considering Ticket Price Increase–Community Feedback Requested

The Board will be considering an increase in ticket prices for in-person events at the meeting on March 8. Ticket prices haven’t increased in over six years, while our costs for events have grown considerably with inflation. In order to keep CSPC events as accessible as possible while ensuring sustainability for the organization, we are proposing to implement a tiered pricing system where members self-select the price of their own tickets upon registration beginning in May. The three price tiers would be $25 for “discounted” tickets (the same as our current ticket price), $30 for “standard tickets,” and $35 for “benefactor” tickets. See more details here.

Please share your thoughts via email at feedback@thecspc.org or complete a feedback form available on our homepage. We also invite community members to join us at the March 8 Board meeting to contribute your thoughts and ideas to the conversation. We are a community for our members, by our members–your voice matters as we make decisions that impact the future of the organization.

March Volunteer Training for Registration and Monitoring

Join us on March 20, 2023, from 7-9 p.m., for our next volunteer training. Monitor training will run from 7-8 p.m. and Registration training will run 8-9 p.m. Registration will open soon–log into Volgistics and register for the training on March 20 to get the Zoom link!

Not yet a volunteer, but want to get in on the action? Join the volunteer corps today! Just complete the on-demand online volunteer orientation and submit the volunteer application located on the Volunteering webpage. It’s that simple! The more parties we host, the more volunteers we need to keep things running smoothly. The CSPC is a fully volunteer-led, volunteer-run non-profit organization created by our members for our members. Become a volunteer and help chart the CSPC’s future!

Consent Corner 23.3

By Emma Atkinson 

Hello sexy readers! Happy March, and welcome to the month that comes and goes like lions and lambs. Or, so they say, apparently.

We’ve been considering the FRIES model of consent that Planned Parenthood developed. Let’s move on to the wonders of the letter R.

Good consent is always Reversible, or as we like to remember it: Revocable. Any participant is free to call a halt to the festivities at any time. It’s good to know, right?

Whatever lovely antics you’re experiencing could trigger uncomfortable or confusing feelings. Whether expected or not, these feelings are calling for your attention and you’d be well-advised to pay them heed.

There are so many reasons why your feelings can be triggered. You could remember an uncomfortable event or unpleasant person who you’d forgotten. You might suddenly understand that your body doesn’t want quite so much of something for which you’d consented. You might be so overwhelmed by emotions that you need to untangle and process. It might be a good time to Reverse or Revoke the consent you’ve given and think things over.

You’re worthy of having experiences that enhance you in body, mind, and spirit. You can request and receive the time and space you need to ponder unexpected feelings. Life is about continuous learning, if we’re fortunate.

We’d like to suggest that good consent can also be remarkable and rip-roaringly fun. Good consent might lead to raucous and rowdy experiences. Of course, your mileage may vary.

Homework: Got any fun and sexy R adjectives? Feel free to share them with us at: info@thecspc.org

“Be excellent to each other.” —Bill and Ted

“Be sexcellent to each other.” —Emma

Flowers' Garden: Tips & Tricks for Making Your Wildest Fantasies Come True!

By Flowers

It's natural and healthy to have sexual fantasies, and exploring them can be a fun and exciting way to add some spice to your sex life. However, making your sexual fantasies come true requires some planning, communication, and consent.

Here are some steps to help you make your sexual fantasies a reality:

1. Understand your fantasy. Before trying to make your fantasy a reality, make sure you fully understand what it is you want. Be specific about what turns you on, what you want to try, and what your limits are. 

2. Communicate with who you are doing the scene with. It's important to talk with EVERYONE in your scene about your fantasies and get their consent. (If it’s just yourself that’s okay too!!!) Discussing what you both/all want and are comfortable with can help avoid misunderstandings and ensure that everyone is on the same page. Clear communication is incredibly important. 

3. Set boundaries. Be clear about what you are and are not comfortable with. This can include things like specific acts or situations, use of protection, or any other limits you have. Remember that it's okay to say no to something you're not comfortable with.

4. Plan ahead. Once you and your possible scene partners have agreed on what you want to do, plan ahead for the experience. This can include things like setting the mood with candles or music, choosing the right location, or preparing any toys or equipment you'll need.

5. Talk to people. If a scene you want to do involves another person, you need to talk to people. Nobody can read your mind, and if you are sitting in a corner not talking to anyone, you may never get to find your match. Introduce yourself, make friends! It also helps a lot to talk to people even if you aren’t super interested in doing a scene with them. Even if they aren’t specifically a good fit, people talk a lot in the community and many love playing matchmaker.  

6. Enjoy the experience. Finally, allow yourself to fully enjoy the experience. Let go of any inhibitions or worries and focus on the pleasure you are experiencing. Communicate with your partner(s) throughout the experience to ensure that you are enjoying yourselves.

Remember that making your sexual fantasies come true requires mutual respect, communication, and consent. With these things in place, exploring your fantasies can be a fun and exciting way to enhance your sex life.

Ask a (Sex Positive!) REALTORⓇ

By Rebecca Bingham

Happy March! There's snow in my yard, but it’s almost spring! Daffodils! Bluebells! Cherry blossoms are just around the corner! Hang in there!

I held an open house a couple of weeks ago and noticed an intangible thing in house pricing. I was at a house listed by another agent with an intriguing, unusual feature. I ran the numbers to compare the sales price, etc. It was STELLAR! Well priced, in an established neighborhood, impeccably updated, and the staging took my breath away, right down to the Magnolia Table book by Joanna Gaines. IYKYK. A Realtor’s aphrodisiac. I was SO FUCKING STOKED! This was gonna rock! My car was packed, and my printer wasn't interested in being helpful, so I shrugged and figured I could email anything someone needed, etc.

I was driving and planning my directional signs to catch people going to the grocery stores to come by the open house, feeling super confident. But then, as I was driving up, four other houses with the same unusual feature were on the street. You could see three of them from the front of the house. This thing—that anywhere else would be showstopping—suddenly lost any perceived value in exclusivity. 

Because of that, the home is overpriced. I had several groups of people come through the open house because it seemed so perfect! I could see their faces fall as they got out of their cars and realized. This made them pickier on the interior and actively look for reasons not to like it. The very excellent and successful listing agent did all their homework. It's priced where it SHOULD sell because of all the updates: the stunning mature landscaping, the bulbs poking their heads up out of the ground in promise; the three-and-a-half car garage; the RV parking; the level, cleared, fenced, and landscaped lot (on city sewer instead of septic, which makes a difference if you ever want to add on) right down to the sexy five-piece primary bathroom suite. The toilet and walk-in shower were in a room just off the bathtub and double sinks, and you walk through the bathroom to the oversized walk-in closet, a detail that I would never have thought of and it makes ALL THE DIFFERENCE. That bathroom even had one extra window high above the bathtub to make soaking an experience any time of day.

However, the price now seems too high because there are four others on the block with the same exterior, so it's not visually exclusive even though it was priced perfectly, in theory.

Thirty percent of houses don't sell the first time they are listed. (Also, that's not a statistic you hear often, is it?) Consider interviewing agents so you can find out why we want to help you sell your home, and if our reasons line up for you, you have a higher chance of being part of the 70%. We want to know why you are moving—ask us why we want to help you sell your house. Motivation is everything in this industry.

On that note, I am going to fully embrace that it's my birthday month (I'm an Aries), and I am going to ask you for a favor:

Help me find a house to list and sell.

My mentor is running a challenge for the month. We have 31 days to list a home, but it can't be for someone we know first degree. It has to be someone YOU know. The reason is, if you know me and that I'm a Realtor, we are already conversing about your needs. This challenge is about stepping out of our comfort zone and listing with a stranger. 

I will not out you. My cell number is (360) 528-1927. Drop me a text with any information you have, or reach out via one of the links below!

Separately, if you have a single-story home, there are NOT ENOUGH of them on the market to meet the needs of the buyers who didn't get a house last spring when everything was clown shoes. I am seeing so many buyers coming in right now needing a one-story or spacious main-floor bedroom (having an ensuite bathroom is not as important as the bedroom on the main floor). 

My lending partners are spending their weekends booked with mortgage consults for clients who are typically coming into the market to buy within the next 45 days, usually faster. It means they are SHOPPING. If you have one, now is the time for a quick close for top dollar, probably with a couple of offers to choose from if the price is correct even for nebulous reasons. You could be on your next adventure by the end of April!

Next column, infographics, I promise. This was a lot of reading. But I know you get why!  Contact me if you have any real estate needs, questions, or referrals, and send me any home-related questions for next month’s column via DM on Fetlife or Facebook. (I’ll keep it confidential, of course!)

xoxo,

Becca

Broaden Your Mind

Other Community Events To Enjoy!

February 23 - March 11

HUMP! Fest is currently playing in Seattle (at On The Boards) and soon to come in Portland, Tacoma, Vancouver BC, and Bellingham! There is also a streaming option if you would like to watch from the comfort of your own dungeon.

https://www.humpfilmfest.com/

March 4

Rain City TNG Play Party!

Rain City TNG (the Next Generation) is a non-profit social and educational organization based in Seattle that hosts events for the 18–35-year-old crowd. Join the play party at the beloved Gallery Erato. 

(Note: Must be a registered FetLife member to view the invite)

https://fetlife.com/events/1252980

March 15

Bloom Community’s CNM Social Club

Consensually Non Monogamous folx (and CNM-curious!) join us 6-8pm to connect, grab some grub, and play pool, darts, and more. More details and sliding scale tickets at:

https://bl.ooo/m/cnm-seattle-hump?r=eirikahdelaunay597

March 19

Sex-Positive World - Sexy Intersections

Join the discussion about anti-oppression and sex-positivity. Online with sliding-scale ticket pricing.

https://www.sexpositiveworld.org/event-details/sexy-intersections-anti-oppression-and-sex-positivity-3

April 21-23

Seattle Erotic Art Festival (SEAF)

Erotic art of every genre–visual, literary, performance, experiential–at Seattle Center’s Exhibition Hall. Join us for a smokin’ hot time!

Tickets: https://www.seattleerotic.org/the-festival/tickets/

Volunteer: https://www.seattleerotic.org/sponsors/get-involved/volunteer/

Masturbation is Healthy!

By Flowers

Masturbation is a natural and healthy sexual activity that provides a range of benefits, both physical and emotional. So in honor of the Myself! party this coming Sunday, February 19, here are some fun facts about the benefits of masturbation. 

1. Masturbation can help reduce stress and promote relaxation. When you masturbate, your body releases endorphins, which are feel-good chemicals that can help you feel more relaxed and calm.

2. Masturbation can help you sleep better. The relaxing sensation induced by endorphins can promote better, deeper sleep.

3. Masturbation can help improve sexual function. By exploring your own body and learning what feels good, you can improve your sexual function and become more comfortable with your own sexuality.

4. Masturbation can help relieve menstrual cramps. Orgasms stimulate blood flow to the pelvic area, which can help relieve menstrual cramps and other pelvic pain.

5. Masturbation can help boost your immune system. Studies have shown that regular sexual activity, including masturbation, can help increase levels of antibodies, which can help boost your immune system.

6. Masturbation can help improve mood and reduce depression. The release of endorphins during masturbation can help elevate your mood and reduce feelings of depression and anxiety. (Endorphins really are good for us!)

7. Masturbation can help improve prostate health. Regular ejaculation can help flush out bacteria and other harmful substances from the prostate gland, which can reduce the risk of prostate cancer and other prostate-related health issues.

Overall, masturbation is a safe and healthy sexual activity, which is why you should join us this Sunday for CSPC’s masturbation-friendly party! In the words of Elle Woods, “Endorphins make you happy!”

Get your tickets for Myself! here! Not yet a member? You can purchase new member tickets here! New member tickets include orientation the hour before the party, your first month’s membership dues, and your party entry immediately following orientation.

News from the Board: Considering Event Price Increase

The topic of a potential increase in event ticket prices was raised at the February Board meeting. This increase would be the first in over six years, and the decision is not an easy one. While our costs for venue rental, laundry, safer sex supplies, event refreshments, and accessibility items have all increased due to inflation, many of our members are struggling to make ends meet as well.

In order to keep CSPC events as accessible as possible while ensuring sustainability for the organization, we are proposing to implement a tiered pricing system where members self-select the price of their own tickets upon registration. The three possible levels would be $25 for a “discounted” ticket, $30 for a “standard” ticket, or $35 for a “benefactor” ticket. 

This would allow members who cannot afford an increase to continue to select the lower $25 price currently in effect, while adding higher priced tickets as “standard,” plus “benefactor” level tickets that balance out the “discounted” tickets. We will track the numbers of tickets sold at each level and member feedback, and will analyze these prior to any future increases.

May would be the earliest we could reasonably have this take effect, as we are already selling tickets for our March and April events. The Board is planning to vote on this proposal at the March Board meeting. 

We are currently soliciting community feedback on this proposal. Please share your thoughts via email at feedback@thecspc.org or complete a feedback form available on our homepage. We also invite community members to join us at the March 8 Board meeting to contribute your thoughts and ideas to the conversation. We are a community for our members, by our members–your voice matters as we make decisions that impact the future of the organization.

Consent Corner 23.2

By Emma Atkinson 

Hello sexy readers! Thanks for checking in to see what’s happening in the sexiest corner! 

Last time we talked about the FRIES model of consent created by Planned Parenthood. Those folks know a thing or two about sex-related matters, don’t they?

First of all, if you’re talking with someone about consent, you know that good times are likely to be ahead, right? Yay for consent conversations!

Good consent happens when it’s Freely given. Coerced agreements are likely to be, at best, unpleasant for at least one participant, and at worst could be seriously harmful. If you find yourself the recipient of what you perceive as attempts at coercion, remember that “No” is a complete sentence. “No, thank you” also works and gets points for kindness, too.

It might be a good time to practice saying “No” with conviction. And practice in receiving a “No” with grace and compassion couldn’t hurt. Practice furthers you on your way to something resembling perfection. 

You’ll know it’s time to ask for help if your “No” isn’t being honored. You might need time to think about a request and consider if it seems like fun. Does it seem like it could be fabulous to do it? Are the others in the consent discussion friendly?

It’s easy to get caught up in a sexy situation and lose your sense of what might be good for you in body, mind, and soul. I’m in agreement with Oscar Wilde: “I can resist everything except temptation.” “More” can be quite tempting in the heat of passion, but its consequences might be unpleasant for some time.

It’s probably a good idea to do a lot of consent discussion before things get hot and heavy. And, it seems wise to engage in these discussions with trustworthy people. Freely given consent to hot and honorable people almost always leads to supremely satisfying experiences. Who doesn’t want that? 

Homework: please consider how you’ve given or received consent freely, and share it at: info@thecspc.org.

“Be excellent to each other.” —Bill and Ted

“Be sexcellent to each other.” —Emma

Flowers’ Garden: Tips and Tricks for Negotiating Consent

By Flowers 

Negotiating kink scenes can be an exciting but challenging experience, as it requires open communication, trust, and respect between all parties. In this article, I will give some tips and tricks for negotiating kink scenes that can help ensure a safe and enjoyable experience for everyone involved.

1. Start with clear communication. The first step in negotiating a kink scene is to have clear communication with your partner(s). Discuss your interests, boundaries, and limits, and make sure everyone is on the same page. This can include discussing specific activities, props, and scenarios that you are interested in, as well as any hard limits or areas of discomfort that you want to avoid.

2. Use safe words. Safe words are a critical component of negotiating kink scenes. Choose a safe word or phrase that everyone understands, and use it to communicate if things are getting too intense or uncomfortable. Remember that safe words should be respected at all times, even if they are not used during the negotiation or scene.

3. Establish a signal for nonverbal communication. In addition to safe words, it can also be helpful to establish a nonverbal signal for communication during a kink scene. This can be particularly useful for individuals who may have difficulty speaking during intense moments or who have their mouths covered during the scene. 

4. Set up a safe and comfortable environment. Creating a safe and comfortable environment is essential for a successful kink scene. Make sure the space is clean, well lit, and free from distractions, and that everyone involved has a comfortable place to rest during breaks. This can help reduce anxiety and ensure that everyone is able to fully relax and enjoy the experience.

5. Take breaks and check in regularly. Kink scenes can be physically and emotionally demanding, so it is important to take regular breaks and check in with your partner(s) throughout the experience. This can involve taking a water break, using the bathroom, or just pausing to talk about how things are going.

6. Have an aftercare plan. Aftercare is a critical part of negotiating kink scenes. This involves taking care of yourself and your partner(s) after the scene is over, including physical and emotional support. Plan ahead for aftercare by having blankets, water, snacks, or other comfort items on hand, and make sure to check in with each other after the scene is over. Aftercare can be very different for everyone, so it is important to discuss and prepare for this ahead of time. 

Kink scenes can be rewarding and enjoyable when done safely and respectfully. By following these negotiation tips and tricks, you can help ensure that everyone involved has a positive and fulfilling experience.