By Turtle
Read Part 1 HERE.
Part 2 will cover techniques and other referential possibilities that you can utilize to diminish the fear effect over time.
Techniques: 4Rs and 3Cs
Foods
Over the Counter: always do your own research and consult your physician
Skills
Apps
The four Rs of Resilience:
Rest - sleep
Relaxation - stress relief
Replenishment - diet
Release - exercise
Following these well-documented ideas can help set the stage (your body and mind) for successful scenes, relationships, and a fantastic life.
It's easier to be in control of your “self” if you set yourself up for success. Get adequate sleep by practicing good sleep hygiene. Most of your REM cycles are toward the end of your sleeping cycle. Make sure the last part of your sleep period is undisturbed. If you feel your body start to be reactive, immediately start using calming techniques.
Relax doing something you really enjoy. If you can't do your favorite hobby, for example,, then use a positive memory of it to begin quieting your mind. Imagine yourself running or playing the flute, painting, or riding a motorcycle, whatever you love.
Everyone knows how important it is to eat properly. However, many are stuck in the old food pyramid taught in elementary school. The incredible amount of research available can be overwhelming. Start by reviewing the basics or talk to a licensed nutritionist. Sometimes this may mean preparing healthy meals for the next day for a special playdate later in the evening.
Exercise in whatever manner you can. Exercise can consist of meditation and envisioning yourself doing something athletic that you enjoy. People will often make excuses because they don't have the time to get out and do their preferred activity. Or they might have a difficult diagnosis that interferes with the ability to exercise. So, we need to do what we can mentally. This might be sitting in one place and clenching your toes, then slowly moving up your body, squeezing and relaxing all the muscles as you go. You are checking in with yourself. The more you do this, the more cognizant of your internal landscape you will become and it will help you move forward to remaining healthy as you get older.
The three Cs of handling anxiety:
Calm Techniques - calm your body
Coping Strategies - correct your thinking
Communication Skills - confront your fears
The three Cs are the next step to building resilience by handling how you respond to your experience.
We all have moments of “cognitive distortion.” This is often displayed by assumptions that cause us to jump to conclusions using faulty logic and then overthinking by chasing the idea around and around and around in our heads.
This can happen by assuming the “what” others think of us or the “why” others did something a certain way. It ramps up our anxiety and releases the hormones that raise our blood pressure and breathing rate. Then, should we apply that anxiety to whatever event or thing we are nervous about in the first place, the wheels come off our ability to reason. We become prey in our lizard brain, running from an apocalypse.
Calming your body can be done with a wide variety of techniques ranging from rhythmic breathing to visualization to simply being present at the moment. The internet, your friends and family, and the doctor will all have ideas for you. Try out many different techniques and keep those that work best for you personally!
Coping strategies can be doing a stable repetition of activities that take your brain “offline” from the rat race. This can be as simple as reading, writing, having a slow cup of tea, a long bath, gaming…anything that allows your gray matter to shift gears daily. These also include more advanced ideas such as personal or group therapy, support groups, and cognitive behavioral therapy.
The more advanced technique discussed above can also be utilized to confront your fears, reframe what you are experiencing, and communicate your needs both to others and yourself. It's healthy to question yourself and challenge your thoughts. Some patterns are ingrained in us as children and this is the best way to make choices for yourself versus just rewriting someone else's history. Accept your anxiety and ask yourself what it is trying to tell you. Perhaps something you learned by rote as a child is irritating your current self because you have a core belief that needs to be questioned and refrained.
Brain Foods:
Just a short list of foods that have been shown to help focus and mental resilience. Which ones do you enjoy?
Extra dark chocolate, leafy greens, broccoli, avocados, green tea, chia or flax seeds, beans and lentils, bananas, honey, eggs, peanuts/natural peanut butter
Over the Counter/Natural Remedies: (always do your own research and consult your physician)
B-9 & B-12 (to help metabolize serotonin)
5-HTP (for focus)
CBD
Kava kava
Chamomile
Lavender
Omega-3 fatty acids
Folic Acid
L-theanine
Magnesium
Ashwagandha
Valerian root
Vitamin D
Skills
Meditation
Music
Relaxation Techniques
Breathing - breathe through the panic
Avoid stimulants like coffee, alcohol, caffeine, energy drinks
Exercise
Share your feelings in a safe atmosphere
Challenge yourself for growth (face your fears, imagine the worst and rewrite the possibilities, look at real documented evidence to apply against fearful thoughts, exposure therapy)
Take time out and reward yourself.
Go back to the basics of living. Stick to a routine.
Remind yourself of ways to stay safe. Have a plan.
Learn to be assertive and build your self-esteem.
Don't try to be “perfect.” It's a false illusion. Be yourself!
Have fun!
Apps
Apps for your phone and computer can help develop resilience, expand your horizons, unlock personal growth, and increase your well-being and fulfillment. Do your own research and use one that actually stimulates your mind so that you'll use it effectively.