Leadership Spotlight: Turtle

This is the tenth of our spotlights on community members who help out the CSPC in leadership positions. In this issue, we’ve asked some questions to get a deep and personal look at our Programming Team Co-Lead, Turtle.

  • Scene name:

    • Turtle

  • Pronouns:

    • However I am presenting. I will not be offended for being addressed as human. 

  • How do you identify?

    • I am a submissive sufferer, differently abled, introverted sapiosexual, pansexual, trigender, little, intuitive heyoka, metaphysical witch. 

  • How long have you been with the CSPC?

    • 10 years

  • What brought you here and what are your main areas of interest?

    • Interest in BDSM initially. Areas of interest include but are not limited to: Come closer… I'll whisper it to you…

  • CSPC e-mail address, title, reasons for contact: 

  • What was your path to your current position?

    • Well, that's a long rambling story. How long do you have? Wouldn't you rather watch a movie and eat popcorn? 

  • Which CSPC event is your favorite and why? 

    • This is a trick question! How much you enjoy a party is totally up to you! In the past: PPMT, Introperverted, Bang for the Buck, Black & Blues, Asylum, R&T

  • Day job:

    • By day, I organize my stuffies, water my plants, meditate, make sure all my books are ordered by size, and my best bud hits the doggo park for intense sniffs. 

  • What do you like to do in your free time?

    • I love music, reading, writing, volunteering, camping, and and and… 

  • Living situation:

    • A nesting mate and a potential long distance yumminess, with some amazing family and friends. Super Max my service dog and Sir Oskar - Lord of All the Flies (cat) 

  • Something no one would ever guess about you or a fun fact:

    • I really am a turtle. 

  • Turn-ons and/or squicks: 

    • It's quite a list. I'm ObliqueBanter on Fet. 

  • Hopes and concerns for the CSPC and the greater sex positive community:

    • My hope is that we all work together for the greater good of our combined communities and have amazing fun doing it! 

  • Advice for a new member or volunteer: 

    • Jump in to volunteer as you'll learn things so much more quickly as well as get to know fantastic people. Also, never say never… Don't be afraid to say, "No". Do feel free to say what you DO want. Take your time. 

  • How can we be here for one another?

    • Listen. Repeat what you think you heard. Actively imagine yourself in the other person's situation.

Leadership Spotlight: Sadie

This is the ninth of our spotlights on community members who help out the CSPC in leadership positions. In this issue, we’ve asked some questions to get a deep and personal look at our Operations Manager and Interim President, Sadie.

  • Scene name:

    • I’m Sadie in the scene.  Miss Sadira Night in formal situations!

  • Pronouns:

    • she/her work fine.  I don’t have any real verve for one set over another, but I was raised female and it’s easy to let those pronouns stand.

  • How do you identify?

    • I am a male woman with femme presentation, demisexual, bisexual, sapiosexual, Domminant, sado-masochist, owner, Mommy/caregiver, head of household, and polyamorous.  I also identify as an ambivert, teacher/educator, mentor, dancer, cat-mom, and person with child-like (not childish) joy!   

  • How long have you been with the CSPC?

    • I joined the CSPC in January of 2003, so about 17 years and counting now.    Since then I spent 4ish years as an event host, a couple years as a board member, and about a year of Operations Management!  

  • What brought you here and what are your main areas of interest?

    • I’ve been a sado-masochist for as long as I remember.  At five, I was having fantasies and I spent my early life wondering what was wrong with me that I was envisioning people being hurt and enjoying it.  In my early relationships, I took over without meaning to, subsuming my partners’ personality and desires without even realizing it.  It bothered me when I did realize.  Eventually, a friend brought me to the CSPC and I began learning in depth about D/s, service, and the ethical structures for consent in a power-exchange relationship as well as how to hurt people safely and in ways that we would both enjoy.  

    • I am not personally interested in the sex-based parties.  I understand their value and that for many people they are freeing, but what interests me is sado-masochism and power dynamics.  Any event that focuses on that, or ends up with a lot of that flavor is something I enjoy.  Protocol parties, medical play parties, impact parties all hold my attention well.  

  • CSPC e-mail address:

  • What was your path to your current position?

    • I joined the CSPC in January of 2003.  The first 8 years, all I did was dance and watch the play happening.  It was difficult for me to step into my identities and roles.  Finally, someone put a submissive in front of me, a paddle in my hand and said, “Go.  You need this.”  From there on in, I felt like I stepped more and more into myself with every interaction! I hope that the CSPC as a venue and community can provide that stepping stone for others like it did for me.

    • In 2018, I joined the board of directors because a friend told me I should and emailed the current board to recommend me.  I didn’t know at the time how involved I would get!  About a year later, the idea for a paid position came up and I quit the board to accept the position after a lengthy hiring process.  At the moment, I am also acting as interim president, though I am not technically a member of the board, nor do I vote unless it is as a tie-breaker.

  • Which CSPC event is your favorite and why? 

    • The Femme SovereignTea is my favorite, hands down, with the Women on Top as a close second.  These parties were where I came into my own personally and in a D/s context, where I met my partner, where I discovered what I wanted out of life.  I am forever grateful to the ones who organized the tea to begin with and those who took it over when the first group retired.  I spent years without missing a single one because I realized that I got cranky the whole next month if I missed it.  It was the first place I got to experiment with Dominance.  The place I learned about submissives and service and impact play.  I was surrounded by strong female Dominants and strong submissives of every gender, inspired by them and wanting to inspire them.  Eventually, I decided that one tea a month wasn’t enough and started hosting my own, and then got asked to help host the CSPC tea.  When CSPC moved to the new space after being dark for some time, I took over the tea and my team hosted it for a couple years.  It is my hope that this and a Femdom party like Women on Top will quickly come back once we are able to re-open.

    • Other events I loved before we went dark included Asylum, Libertine, The Grind, and House Wildfire.

  • Career or day job:

    • I have so many secret identities…  Currently I do business consulting with commercial real estate, work with scholarships, manage charity funds, manage a short term rental calendar, act, do operations management at the CSPC, and individualized private kink education (safety, impact, service, D/s, etc…). 

    • In the past I have been an elementary school teacher, massage practitioner, and all sorts of other odd jobs, both volunteer and paid.  

  • What do you like to do in your free time?

    • What is this free time of which you speak?

    • I enjoy training my submissives, reading, cooking, kayaking, getting out in the sun, playing video games (Binding of Isaac and Civilization at the moment), dancing, and learning arts and crafts.  Not doing the art or craft mind you, just learning them.  Learning in general is something I enjoy, whether it is learning more about the people around me or philosophical, academic, or practical learning.  Most of all though, I love interacting with people that I care about; connecting, discussing, and spending time with.  

  • Living situation:

    • I live with and preside over my submissive-princess-pet-partner and two other cats in the Dom(me)icile House.  We’ve got a sweet little love-nest set up with a constantly used kitchen and a dungeon that should get more use!

  • Something no one would ever guess about you / fun fact:

    • I used to do trick horseback riding.  I have pictures of me standing on a running horse somewhere around here!  

    • I used to teach Sunday School.

    • Once upon a time, a long, long time ago in the 80s, I went to Disneyland with Jon Cryer.  I didn’t know who he was, but my friends made a big deal of it, asked me to get an autograph,etc.  

  • Turn-ons and squicks: 

    • My main turn-ons are connection and control and pain. Connection has to come first.  They go together for me.  Because connection is one of my turn-ons, I can get into almost anything if I care about a person and they enjoy it, connect over it.  If what they desire links into being controlled and/or suffering, that is all the sweeter.  CNC (consensual non-consent) and devotional relationships, developed slowly in such a way that everyone involved feels safe and supported, hold a special place in my heart.

    • When I desire someone, I want all of them, all of what they are.  I want to bring out the best in them through love, pain, joy, and suffering.  I want devotion and surrender from them.  I want them to move further and further into who and what they are, into the best version of themselves.  My partners are varied, and each one has been so unique.  Each gives and is something so different from any other.  

    • My squicks revolve around disrespect, dishonesty, fakeness, a lack of consent, and a lack of connection.

  • Hopes and concerns for the CSPC and the greater sex positive community:

    • I want the Center to grow back into the community center that it once was, only better.  A place for those who are exploring their sexual freedom to come and play, socialize, meet people, learn from one another, watch, and be free to be themselves.  We are not just a club, we are a community of people who are of all walks of life and many ways of being, who join together for the sexual freedom of all.

    • I hope that we are one of many organizations in this country that promote and allow for the visibility of sexual minorities, and that we can work together to do so.  That anyone who is participating in consensual sexuality, whatever that looks like for them, would have the freedom and place to do so whether with us or with another organization in their area.  

  • Advice for a new member or volunteer: 

    • Get involved.  Meet people.  Talk to everyone, don’t just target those you’re attracted to.  Be a community member.  Be open to new ideas.  Volunteer.  Pair great freedom with great responsibility.  Go to classes and munches and parties and take the time to get to know the community as well as what you are desiring.  

  • Is there an event or organization, outside of the CSPC, that you feel our community should know about?

    • There are a number of wonderful organizations and events around this area.  The Streamhouse is an amazing venue for events and a B&B.  Inn Thrall has, sadly, moved to Philadelphia, but is still an incredible B&B and Femdom-based venue.  I know of Subspace and Kitsap Aces, though I haven’t been to either yet.  There are munches almost every day of the week during non-Covid times as well that are wonderful ways to build the community.  I’m personally partial to the Greenwood munch and the Blue Munch.

    • For larger conventions, I’ve been to and loved Kinkfest, Frolicon, The Gathering, CapCon, West Coast Jungle Gym.  I miss Paradise and Renegade’s Rendez-vous and hope eventually we’re able to do more kinky campout conventions!

    • And, of course, Dom(me)icile Events are simply the best!

  • How can we build up each other? How can we be here for one another?

    • I think the second question encapsulates itself.  We need to be here for one another.  Whether as a community or individuals, we should be constantly working for inclusion and to dismantle barriers to everyone having the ability to pursue their own lives and happiness, including their sexuality.  The idea of “your kink is not my kink, but your kink is ok” often comes across as simplistic or even condescending to me, but in essence, it’s the idea we need to live by in order to be there for one another.

Leadership Spotlight: Cass

This is the eighth of our spotlights on community members who help out the CSPC in leadership positions. In this issue, we’ve asked some questions to get a deep and personal look at our newest Board Member, Cass.

  • Name and scene name:

    • Cass. Coco-pussy on Fetlife 

  • Pronouns:

    • She / her

  • How do you identify?

    • I am Bisexual and Switch. I am Dom to many but only sub to one.

  • How long have you been with the CSPC?

    • I have been a participant for many years and recently became a board member in June. 

  • What brought you here and what are your main areas of interest?

    • I was fortunate to discover the CSPC at a time when I needed an outlet for my energy and trying to define myself as a single person. 

  • CSPC e-mail address:

  • What brought you to your current position?

    • I feel being an outspoken, positive, and sexually empowered woman of color will help others find their voice and place.

  • Which CSPC event is your favorite and why? 

    • I always loved the Afternoon Delight events and Fem Dom parties.

  • Career:

    • I am a Healthcare Professional in Kirkland 

  • What do you like to do in your free time?

    • I love antiquing, live music, and cooking. 

  • Living situation:

    • I am in an open relationship with a wonderful partner who is my Dom. 

  • Fun fact:

    • I lost my virginity in my 20's.

  • Turn-ons: 

    • I am a sucker for a great smile and sense of humor.  And confidence is the epitome of sexy.

  • Hopes and concerns for the CSPC:

    • My hope is that the CSPC will once again become "The Center"! I want us to be that pillar in the community that comes to mind when you think of safety, inclusion, expression, resources, sexual freedom, empowerment, and family. 

  • Advice for a new member or volunteer: 

    • Do it. Be a part of an organization that wants what you want. Help us become the Great organization we need.

  • Is there an event or organization, outside of the CSPC, that you feel our community should know about?

    • I just think finding your people right now is important.  Be with people who want what is best and healthy for you.

Leadership Spotlight: Kelly

This is the seventh of our spotlights on community members who help out the CSPC in leadership positions. In this issue, we’ve asked some questions to get a deep and personal look at Board Member and Programming Team Co-Lead, Kelly.

  • Name and handle: 

    • Kelly (Jagged_Edge on FetLife)

  • Pronouns: 

    • She / Her

  • How do you identify? 

    • I am a cis-female and I present as quite feminine and have a very assertive personality. I am pan-sexual and while I have led and followed in relationships, I identify most as an s-type. I am highly primal and identify strongly as prey.

  • How long have you been with the CSPC? 

    • I began volunteering in 2012. 

  • What brought you here and what are your main areas of interest? 

    • I always thought there was something peculiar about my sexuality and the way I related to men in that realm. When I found BDSM in 2000, I realized that there were words that described me and that I was not alone. I found self-acceptance in learning about BDSM and the courage to be myself, and to let that authenticity be seen by others. 

    • I am here to help others learn about themselves and to develop the courage to live authentically, to the extent they are safe to do so. My passion lies with working with people newer to kink, or simply new to the Seattle kink scene. 

  • CSPC e-mail address, roles, and areas you cover: 

    • My email is kelly@thecsp.corg. In addition to working on the board, I currently co-lead the Programming Team (programming@thecspc.org) and am the program manager for the Passport Program (cspc.passport@gmail.com). So, I am the appropriate person to contact if you are interested in starting any kind of programming at the CSPC or if you have any questions or are interested in attending Passport. I would also love to hear from you if you are interested in working on the programming team or volunteering in any way with the CSPC. 

  • What was your path to your current position? 

    • The CSPC was the first place I’d ever undressed and played in public. Volunteering quickly allowed me to find a chosen family with whom I could finally, really be myself. I am outgoing and work well with others, so serving as an ambassador, a role we don’t currently utilize, was a natural fit for me. I then began monitoring and at about the same time, with a fellow volunteer I began co-leading the Passport Program, which helps newer community members acclimate to and learn more about the sex-positive culture. 

    • Soon after, I also began working with the Programming Team, evaluating the large number of parties we were running at the time, and then in 2014 I utilized my event planning skills to lead the team producing the Masquerade fundraiser. I went on to co-champion both Passport and OnRamp, an educational-based party. 

    • I started the newest version of the Programming Team in 2018 and continued managing Passport while championing two parties, Fresh Meet and PAINS. I was asked to join the board in April of this year. 

  • Which CSPC event is your favorite and why? 

    • Unfair question… Passport is my baby and I very much enjoy serving our community as its program manager. My favorite party to attend was In Irons, which was one of our hardest S&M parties in our old space. It encouraged party-goers to really exude their internal experience while they played (the party tagline was “We like to hear you scream!”) I would like to bring it back, incidentally, so please let me know if you would like to champion the party.

  • Career: 

    • I am in sales and sales management. 

  • What do you like to do in your free time?

    • These days, I enjoy paddleboarding and I swim with a monofin and a mermaid tail. There is nothing like swimming swiftly through the water - it is so freeing. I also like softball, music and frisbee. 

  • Living situation: 

    • I am poly and live in an intentionally-built poly household. I have three male partners and one female partner. We practice kitchen table poly, so I know my metamours, and my partners know one another. I have no pets, but am planning on getting a puppy when I can.

  • Fun fact: 

    • I had to have much of my lower jaw removed and reconstructed due to aggressive tumors. I had amazing surgeons and am healthy now.

  • Turn-ons and squicks: 

    • Oh, what a great question. As an auralist, I am turned on by sound, and have a thing for voices. I also appreciate subtle, confident dominance. I am undone by vulnerability and authenticity… and violence. Admitting what squicks me out offers way too much ammunition to my partners, so I will keep those to myself. I will say though, that I believe that an individual’s authentic sexual expression is a human right and I don’t align with the “my kink is fine but yours is not” mentality.  

  • Hopes and concerns for the CSPC and the greater sex positive community: 

    • I would like for us to once again become the community center that I loved, only better. I assess that BIPOC are under-represented in our community and I want to ensure that we are creating a space for everyone. I hope we have a building of our own as soon as we can and begin creating parties and programming that serve us all. I want for us to have a home where we can all explore and be our authentic selves. I am concerned that people don’t have the opportunity to learn how to explore safely and intend to continue creating educational opportunities so we can continue to explore ourselves and invite collaborators.

  • Advice for new members or volunteers: 

    • For new members: I know it can be scary to begin exploring a world that is new, not only are the people and many of the terms new, but you might be taking steps that force you to get to know yourself in different ways. I celebrate your decision to take those courageous steps. The best thing I did when I was in that space was to begin volunteering. I immersed myself in this subject matter and with people I could learn from and by whom I could be cared for. 

    • For new volunteers: Don’t be shy. Jump in. Be forthcoming with your abilities if you are open to utilizing them and share what you would like to learn so we can get you hooked up with the opportunity to contribute while you are learning. We need you more than you might even know. Please don’t assume you don’t know enough, if you are open to learning and showing up, we will be thrilled to have you. There is room for everyone.

  • Is there an event or organization, outside of the CSPC, that you feel our community should know about? 

    • The Seattle community has changed a lot over the years and there are now so many venues to be explored and celebrated. Once we are able, I recommend exploring them. We all offer something a little different and you are bound to learn things about yourself or can at least count on making some new friends. For now, it is probably worth seeking out some of these organizations to see if they are offering programming during Covid. 

Leadership Spotlight: MaryAnne

This is the sixth of our spotlights on community members who help out the CSPC in leadership positions. In this issue, we’ve asked some questions to get a deep and personal look at our Board Treasurer, MaryAnne.

  • Name and scene name: 

    • MaryAnne / Emma

  • Pronouns: 

    • she / her

  • CSPC e-mail address, title, and areas you cover: 

  • What was your path to your current position? 

    • I was a librarian, food prep volunteer, registration assistant, and I did a lot of laundry.

  • What do you like to do in your free time? 

    • I’m a DJ, art enthusiast, and avid reader.

  • Fun fact: 

    • I’m actually a rather private person.  

  • Advice for a new member: 

    • Jump in and start volunteering as soon as you can. That’s what I did, and it was great to have a reason to stand around and feel uncomfortable instead of just standing around feeling uncomfortable. I got to know a lot of great people and I learned a lot, too. 

  • Anything else we should know? 

    • I may not fully appreciate all kinds of music or sexual expression, but I’ll defend to the death your right to create and enjoy what you do. Every day presents an opportunity to be the person cats already think I am.

Leadership Spotlight: Skitty

This is the fifth of our spotlights on community members who help out the CSPC in leadership positions. In this issue, we’ve asked some questions to get a deep and personal look at our Board Member and Volunteer Liaison, Skitty.

  • Name and scene name: 

    • Shelley Gauthier / Skitty

  • Pronouns:

    •  she/her

  • How do you identify? 

    • cis female, pansexual, polyamorous, kinky, and submissive

  • How long have you been with the CSPC? 

    • four years

  • What brought you here and what are your main areas of interest? 

    • I used to live about a mile from the old Interbay location, and had heard rumors that there was a “sex club” under the Magnolia Bridge. Shocking! So four years ago, when I began to open up my relationship with my new partner, I had to check it out. Let’s just say, I got more than I bargained for!

  • CSPC e-mail address, title/role, areas you cover: 

  • What was your path to your current position? 

    • I was a member for a year and a half before joining the Programming Team. Soon after that, I became Co-Lead. I kept attending events and accumulating volunteer roles and in February of 2020, I joined the Board of Directors. At that point, I was in love with the CSPC and couldn’t get enough, so it seemed like a great idea to resurrect the role of Volunteer Liaison and create a Communications Team. I think I’ve finally reached my hard limit.

  •  Which CSPC event is your favorite and why? 

    • I love the warm, charming, fun energy of “Fucking Precious” but I have to say, my favorite party is LaQueer. It is at the LaQueer parties that I feel most at home. It is a feast for the senses. “Queer” is a very large umbrella and this is an inclusive event for all of us. The last LaQueer I went to had dozens of scenes and every one of them was a different combination of people enjoying one another in a different combination of ways.

  • Career or day job: 

    • Most of my teaching career has been in Special Education. These days, I am a full time volunteer with the CSPC and at KEXP.

  • What do you like to do in your free time? 

    • I love to read, attend live music events, and spend hours talking, especially if it includes food and drink. One of my favorite things is when people disagree with me. I appreciate hearing different points of view and reconsidering my perceptions based on the experiences and viewpoints of others. Always learning!

  • Living situation (partners, roommates, pets, plants): 

    • I live with my male nesting partner, two teenage sons, and two ridiculously fluffy cats. I also have a long distance girlfriend and a non-binary Mistress who works tirelessly to keep me in line.

  • Something no one would ever guess about you or a fun fact: 

    • I’m afraid of sharks in swimming pools but only after dark.

  • Turn-ons:

    • Negotiation, consent, practicing safer sex, and having my neck kissed and bitten.

  • Squicks: 

    • I’m squicked by tickling. I know a lot of people love this but if you tickle my feet, you just might end up with a bloody nose from an involuntary kick.

  • Advice for a new member or volunteer: 

    • Create the community you want by speaking up, reaching out, and volunteering.

  • Is there an event or organization, outside of the CSPC, that you feel our community should know about? 

    • Bawdy Storytelling is an amazing event that used to take place monthly at the Re-Bar and is now happening online. Storytellers share personal, true stories about sex, kink, body image, gender, and so much more!

Leadership Spotlight: Rachel Drake

This is the fourth of our spotlights on community members who help out the CSPC in leadership positions. In this issue, we’ve asked some questions to get a deep and personal look at our Board Member, Rachel, who specializes in policy, ethics, and consent.

  • Name: 

    • Rachel Drake

  • Pronouns: 

    • she/they

  • How do you identify? 

    • Ethically non-monogamous: solo-poly-swinger, queer, kinky switch, CNC submissive. 

  • How long have you been with the CSPC? 

    • 8 years 

  • What was your path to your current position? 

    • I served as the Entertainment and Education Director for New Horizons Adult Social Club for several years producing 350+ sex-positive adult parties and events. I was a professional event planner/manager, and have served on the BoD and consulted for numerous non-profits for three decades.

  • Which CSPC event is your favorite and why? 

    • My favorite parties are when I get to see people feeling confident, sexy and safe.

  • Career: 

    • In addition to working on my degree, I currently coach individuals, communities, and organizations in improving their consent and accountability practices. I am also an educator, speaker, and author, currently I am working on my second book. 

  • What do you like to do in your free time? 

    • I enjoy printmaking, flow arts, picnics in weird places, surprise shenanigans, going to the beach to watch the sunset and the moon rise.

  •   Fun fact: 

    • My Pandemic “Drive-thru” BINGO card is almost full! So far I have: Drive-thru margaritas, Drive-thru protest, Drive-thru graduation, Drive-thru movie, Drive-thru rave and Drive-thru strip club!

  • Turn-ons: 

    • Creativity and interesting conversations are big turn-ons for me.

  • Hopes and concerns for the sex positive community: 

    • The pandemic has been hard on the greater sex-positive community. My hope is that this time will be beneficial in that people take the time to get to know themselves and what they want to explore. 

  • Advice for a new member or volunteer: 

    • Don’t be afraid to speak up and make suggestions, step up and create something you have always fantasized about, ask lot’s of questions! There is a lot to learn and much of the culture is community specific.

  •  Is there an event or organization, outside of the CSPC, that you feel our community should know about? 

Leadership Spotlight: Larry Grella

This is the third of our spotlights on community members who help out the CSPC in leadership positions. In this issue, we’ve asked some questions to get a deep and personal look at our Chair of the Building Committee (and unofficial historian), Larry.

  • Name and/or scene name: 

    • Larry Grella aka Temptr

  • Pronouns: 

    • he/him

  • How do you identify? 

    • cis male, all identity friendly, Top/Daddy

  • How long have you been with the CSPC?  

    • I joined the CSPC in 2002, was invited to the board in 2005, was a founding member of the FSPC (now Pan~Eros Foundation) and still serve on both boards

  • What brought you here and what are your main areas of interest? 

    • I used to think I must be weird until I found the Center, now I want to help others learn that they are normal and acceptable.

  • CSPC e-mail address, title/role, reasons for contact/areas you cover: 

    • Temptr@gmail.com, Chair of the Building Committee, Property Search & Construction

  • What was your path to your current position?

    • I have bought & sold properties and am a General Contractor

  • Which CSPC event is your favorite and why? 

    • Myself! Party, because it offers anyone a place to fulfill their sexual fantasies without many restrictions 

  • Career or day job: 

    • I am a self-employed General Contractor

  • What do you like to do in your free time? 

    • Ha! I have almost no free time. Not only am I on the Boards of CSPC & Pan~Eros Foundation but I’m also on the Board of The Gathering NW and I’m construction manager for SEAF.

  • Living situation: 

    • I live alone but have several play partners as well as two Miniature American Shepherds

  • Something no one would ever guess about you or a fun fact:  

    • In my early twenties I was a nude model. 

  • Turn-ons and/or squicks: 

    • My favorite types of play are mind fucks and fire play

  • Hopes and concerns for the CSPC and/or the greater sex positive community: 

    • I want us to find our own building and get back to being a community center.

  • Advice for a new member or volunteer: 

    • My advice for new members is to become a volunteer. There is no better way to meet people and to garner credibility.

  • Is there an event or organization, outside of the CSPC, that you feel our community should know about? 

Leadership Spotlight: Nick Vu

This is the second of our spotlights on community members who help out the CSPC in leadership positions. In this issue, we’ve asked some questions to get a deep and personal look at our Board President, Nick.

  • Name and/or scene name: 

    • Nick aka Mandroid

  • Pronouns: 

    • They/Them, but any pronouns are fine

  • How do you identify? 

    • I’m a mixed race, gender nonconforming, male bodied, switch, poly, queer. But honestly, I don’t hold onto these categories too tightly.

  • How long have you been with the CSPC? 

    • 5 years

  • What brought you here and what are your main areas of interest? 

    • I grew up Southern Baptist so worked through a lot of shame throughout my 20s and finally started exploring at 30. The CSPC not only opened my eyes to countless possibilities, but allowed me to observe the nuances of these dynamics in action. I joined the board to offer my experience with startups to the cause of sexual freedom. 

  • Which CSPC event is your favorite and why? 

    • The Grind. I love dancing, but am socially shy, so if I was ever feeling awkward I could always jump on the dance floor and have fun. 

  • Career or day job: 

    • I perfume and run a brand called Namesake Fragrance.

  • What do you like to do in your free time? 

    • I write about developmental psychology, run and rock climb, listen to audiobooks constantly, and spend time with friends.

  • Living situation: 

    • I’m committed to living alone. No pets, though in the last several years I had an ant farm and a beehive...until they both collapsed. Eusocial animals are endlessly fascinating.

  • Something no one would ever guess or a fun fact: 

    • I used to be a competitive Rubik’s cuber, holding 2nd in the country for blindfold solving. 

  • Turn-ons: 

    • I dabble in lots of activities, but I’m most fond of silly, playful group sex with my friends as well as finding connection through sexual exploration with a partner. The hottest sex scenes are mundane scenarios and full of tension, because of their relatability. I am very physically responsive, and being licked will make me convulse and flop around in ecstasy.

  • Hopes and concerns for the CSPC and/or the greater sex positive community: 

    • My personal hope is that the Center doubles down on prioritizing “trust building”. If we can take the time and care to earn each other's trust, I believe a powerful, active, and adaptable community will emerge. And even if it doesn’t, the time spent boldly caring will have been worthwhile on its own. My concern is that we might be putting routine and logistics before connection, which I suspect is a recipe for burnout. Certainly behind the scenes there are deadlines and things that need to get done, but it would be prudent to establish and nurture connection, which can then serve as motivation for hard work. I haven’t done a good job prioritizing this during my involvement. 

  • Advice for a new member or volunteer: 

    • Dial up the warmth, care, and patience you give to people and tasks. Take pride in that effort, regardless, or especially, if it goes unnoticed. These little moments are building an environment of compounding positivity for everyone who steps in it.

  • Is there an event or organization, outside of the CSPC, that you feel our community should know about? 

    • I would recommend the Savage Lovecast podcast. https://www.savagelovecast.com/ Living this alternative lifestyle in a vanilla-presenting world can be confounding. It is useful to get regular reminders of healthier ways to navigate unconventional relationships. Note: if you don’t like politics, skip the intro. 

  • CSPC e-mail address, title, reasons for contact: 

    • nick@theCSPC.org; board president; reach out with notes of encouragement, concerns, and offers to pitch in.