Consent Corner 1.24

by Emma Atkinson and Rachel Drake

Hello lovely readers!  Can you believe that life seems to be heading to some variation of normal?  We’ve been enjoying hugs (and more!) that were deferred in the interest of good health.  Of course, we’re all the gatekeepers of what’s appropriate for our own health and safety.

In the prior newsletter we posed a question:  how do you know when it’s time to acknowledge a consent issue?  Remember that we’re not talking about clear steps over the line:  something done that was expressly banned, or not honoring safewords (prearranged signals to pause or stop activities).  We’re talking about when you have feelings that seem uncomfortable and you’re not clear on how to interpret them.  You know that something’s not quite right, but you don’t know what it is.  And, we’ve talked before about how unexpected feelings can come up in consensual activities.  

The good news is that we have an answer to that question.  Yay!  Our answer is that only you can make the call about what those nagging feelings represent.  You can bring in a friend or trusted advisor to get clarity.  You can meditate or take a walk if that helps.  You can Google it - we’re big fans of whatever works.

The better news is that the answer is simple, but admittedly not always easy.  Our advice is to make friends with those feelings, and gently inquire about what they’re trying to tell you.  Give those feelings a hug (if they’re huggable) and thank them for their service.  They’re showing up to help you.  They might be alerting you to something that needs a discussion with others.  They might be asking you to resolve an issue for yourself.  You’ll find the wisdom and strength to do what’s next for you.

Homework:  No homework!  Please let your sexy self enjoy this beautiful summer weather.

Please share your joy with us at:  info@thecspc.org.

“Be excellent to each other” - Bill and Ted

“Be sexcellent to each other” - Emma and Rachel

Volunteer Position: Discord Server Moderator

The Center for Sex Positive Culture welcomes everyone and encourages our members who identify as BIPOC or LGBTQ/SGL to apply for this volunteer position.

Summary/Overview:

Moderate the Center for Sex Positive Culture (CSPC) Discord server on a regular, preferably daily, basis. This position works closely with the server Caretaker and reports to the Communications Director.

Responsibilities:

  • Check out what’s happening on the server on either a daily basis or an agreed upon schedule

  • Report any unusual, inflammatory, or discriminatory chats or activity

  • Take appropriate action when members break server rules

  • Answer or refer questions asked by members

  • Engage with other members on the server, as you are comfortable

  • Help make the server a fun, frisky, and inclusive place to hang out

  • Suggest improvements and new possibilities

Qualifications:

  • Member of the CSPC

  • Completed a Volunteer Orientation (can be arranged before start date)

  • Ability to objectively assess conflicts and draw evidence-based conclusions

  • Acceptable social and conflict resolution skills

  • Regular Discord user

  • Willing to engage with others on Discord

  • Comfortable having a Discord account associated with the CSPC server

Contact:

The Center for Sex Positive Culture creates spaces to celebrate, develop, and explore sexuality and sensuality among a diverse, supportive community.

Consent Corner 1.23

by Emma Atkinson and Rachel Drake

Hello sexy, sassy readers!  We hope Pride was everything you hoped for and more.  

We’re very excited as we plan to bring you another version of Consent Corner in upcoming newsletters.  Be on the lookout for Version 2.0 and forward as your favorite corner transforms.  It’s kind of like Doctor Who, who changes into a different physical presence over his (or now her) life.  It’s a Time Lord thing - look it up if you’re unfamiliar with its intricacies.

We’d like to pose a question:  how do you know when it’s time to acknowledge a consent issue?  We’re not talking about clear steps over the line:  something done that was expressly banned or not honoring safewords (prearranged signals to pause or stop activities).  We’re talking about when you have feelings that seem uncomfortable and you’re not clear on how to interpret them.  You know that something’s not quite right, but you don’t know what it is.  

We’ve talked before about how unexpected feelings can come up in consensual activities.  You can get triggered into feeling scared or anxious.  Something might come up for you that you thought had been resolved.  And, there it is, right in front of you, shifting the experience from what you’d expected or consented to into something different.  It’s kind of like in Doctor Who, when the T.A.R.D.I.S. takes him or her and companion(s) to a different planet or time.  They’re experiencing an important event in Earth history, and then they’re in the future on another planet.  You might say, “Wait, how did I get here?”  

Stay tuned as we explore this idea of exploring our feelings.  In the meantime, there’s homework!

Homework:  Think about times in your experiences when you weren’t sure how to handle a consent issue, or if a consent issue actually represented a violation.  If you’re anything like us, you’ve got an ample supply.  

Extra Credit:  check out Gavin de Becker and his book “The Gift of Fear.”  Spoiler:  The gift is that sense you have that something’s not quite right.

Extra Extra Credit:  If you’re a fan of sci-fi, British TV, or if you’re just curious, look up Doctor Who.  We think you’ll be glad you did.  

You’ll be glad to give us praise at:  info@thecspc.org.

“Be excellent to each other” - Bill and Ted

“Be sexcellent to each other” - Emma and Rachel

SO MUCH TO DO, SO LITTLE TIME...

by Teeebone

Have you ever wondered what the weekly event schedules were like back in the day when the CSPC was at Interbay? I dug up three examples to give you an idea of the length and breadth as well as the sheer enormity of just how much the Center had to offer. I often look back and wonder (as long-term volunteer) how I managed to survive such a crazy, busy time in my life. :3

First, here’s a weekly schedule from 2004. I had been a member for little over a year and the Center was often referred to as the “Wet Spot,” though back then its official name was the Sex Positive Community Center or SPCC. It consisted of only the Main Space in those days, and on-site parties/events typically happened 3-4 times a week.

MONDAY, July 5, 2004

Dom/Me Discussion Group..................... 7:30 PM to  9:00 PM

TUESDAY, July 6, 2004

Gor Discussion Group........................ 7:00 PM to  9:00 PM

WEDNESDAY, July 7, 2004

Drop-In Wednesday..................[MR/AG].. 4:00 PM to 10:00 PM

Pacific NW Sex Educators Forum

(OFFSITE at a home in Ballard).............. 7:30 PM to  9:00 PM

Red Hot Words and More.............[MR/AG].. 8:00 PM to 10:00 PM

THURSDAY, July 8, 2004

The Grind..........................[MR]..... 9:00 PM to  1:00 AM

FRIDAY, July 9, 2004

Polycamp

(see below for event description)

(OFFSITE at The Longhouse)

(Friday afternoon to Monday Noon)...........TIME INFO BELOW

Intro to Sex-Positive Culture............... 8:00 PM

Erotic City:

Iron Chef Live Sushi Night

(see below for event description)..[MR]..... 9:00 PM to  2:00 AM

SATURDAY, July 10, 2004

Polycamp

(see below for event description)

(OFFSITE at The Longhouse)

(Friday afternoon to Monday Noon)...........TIME INFO AT LEFT

Whip Enthusiasts Group...................... Noon    to  3:00 PM

Poly Potluck at Polycamp

(see below for event description)

(OFFSITE at The Longhouse).................. 5:00 PM to  8:00 PM

Poly Potluck................................ 5:00 PM to  8:00 PM

Pansexual BDSM Social..............[MR]..... 8:00 PM to  9:00 PM

Pansexual BDSM Night...............[MR]..... 9:00 PM to  3:00 AM

SUNDAY, July 11, 2004

Polycamp

(see below for event description)

(OFFSITE at The Longhouse)

(Friday afternoon to Monday Noon)...........TIME INFO AT LEFT

Kinky Brunch

(OFFSITE at Guppy's)........................11:00 AM to  2:00 PM

Massage Night

(doors close at 7:00 PM)...........[MR]..... 6:00 PM to 10:00 PM


Next up we have a schedule from 2009. At this point the SPCC had become the CSPC, and we had acquired the Annex, which allowed us to have 2 parties/events going on the same night. Accordingly, this greatly expanded our schedule list.

MONDAY, June 8, 2009

Kinky Crafters munch (in the Annex) 6:00 PM to 9:00 PM

Big Committee Meeting (in the Annex) 6:30 PM to 8:30 PM

Monday Madness! 7:00 PM to 12:00 AM

TUESDAY, June 9, 2009

Daytime Playtime 11:00 AM to 5:00 PM

Drop-In Tuesday (in the Annex) 4:00 PM to 10:00 PM

Owners & Slaves Discussion 7:00 PM to 10:00 PM

Volunteer Training Sessions 7:00 PM to 9:00 PM

WEDNESDAY, June 10, 2009

Life Drawing (in the Annex) 7:00 PM to 9:00 PM

The Hump--Booty-licious Butt music 8:00 PM to 12:00 AM

THURSDAY, June 11, 2009

FetLife Mid-Day Munch 2:00 PM to 6:00 PM

Thursday New Member Orientation 7:00 PM to 8:00 PM

Grind -- Party and Dance 9:00 PM to 1:00 AM

The Chill - In the Annex 9:00 PM to 1:00 AM

FRIDAY, June 12, 2009

New Member Orientation: Intro to Sex-Positive Culture 7:30 PM to 8:30 PM

Tie me up, Take me down... 9:00 PM to 2:00 AM

Partner's Party -- in the Annex 9:00 PM to 2:00 AM

SATURDAY, June 13, 2009

Whip Enthusiasts Group 12:00 PM to 3:00 PM

Gor Discussion Group 4:00 PM to 6:00 PM

Saturday New Member Orientation 6:30 PM to 7:30 PM

Pansexual BDSM Social 8:00 PM to 9:00 PM

Pansexual BDSM Experience: Whips, Mayhem & Metal 9:00 PM to 3:00 AM

Caribbean Groove presents "It’s Time for a Sacrifice!" 9:00 PM to 3:00 AM

SUNDAY, June 14, 2009

Sunday Morning Yoga 10:30 AM to 11:30 AM

Fem Domme Tea 12:00 PM to 5:00 PM

Volunteer Appreciation 10th Anniversary BBQ 2:00 PM to 8:00 PM

No Safeword Writers' Group (Sun) 1:00 PM to 3:00 PM

Massage Night  5:00 PM to 9:00 PM

And finally, we have a schedule from 2015. At this point, the CSPC had acquired the Raw Space, which greatly expanded the play space for events held in either the Main Space or the Annex. Also of note is that the Grind had switched from a weekly to a monthly party in the schedule, which allowed a bunch of other new events/parties to step into the available Thursday night slots.

Wednesday, July 1, 2015

The Hump Social: 6:00pm - 8:00pm, Main Space

The Hump: 8:00pm - 12:00am, Main Space

Whump at the Hump!: 8:00pm - 12:00am, Raw Space

 

Thursday, July 2, 2015

New Member Orientation: 6:30pm-8pm, Main Space

Frolic on 15th (age limited): 9:00pm - 1:00am

The Chill: 9:00pm - 1:00am, Annex & Raw Space

 

Friday, July 3, 2015

Passport Meeting: 7:00pm - 8:00pm, Main Space

Asylum: 8:00pm - 2:00am, Annex

On the Market & After Party: 8pm - 2am, Main Space

Saturday, July 4, 2015

Morning Wood: 10:00am - 3:00pm, Main Space

 

Sunday, July 5, 2015

Bondage is the Point: 7pm - 12am, Main Space  

 

Monday, July 6, 2015

Monday Madness: 7:00pm - 12:00am, Main Space

 

Tuesday, July 7, 2015

Daytime Playtime: 12:00pm-4:00pm, Main Space

New Member Orientation: 5pm-6:30pm, Main Space

On Ramp: 7:00pm - 12:00am, Main Space

So, there you have it. Just a few examples of how the CSPC strived to have something for everybody in the community. :3

Consent Corner 1.22

by Emma Atkinson and Rachel Drake

Hello lovely readers, and we hope you’re relishing all the juicy aspects of Pride.  Doesn’t it seem like the world is opening up a little bit?  There are more people out in parks, gathering in small groups, and enjoying what the Pacific Northwest has to offer at this time of year.  

Question:  you see a friend who you haven’t seen since pre-COVID - what do you do?  You want to give them a big hug, but what’s the new etiquette?  You can’t assume that your own comfort level with physical contact is the same as your friend’s comfort level.  

We like to suggest that right now the world is giving us opportunities to hone our consent skills.  Could we ask our friend:  would you prefer to hug, bump elbows, high five, or share a smile?  Could we ask:  are you huggable?  Imagine how impressed your friend will be as you flex the consent muscles you’ve been building in our time together.  What’s even better is knowing that the consensual greeting can be followed by what’s really important - reconnecting with a loved one.

Homework:  savor Pride celebrations, find a way to ask about physical contact that feels good for you, and look for chances to practice good consent.  Please, and thank you.  

We give our consent for contact at:  info@thecspc.org.

“Be excellent to each other” - Bill and Ted

“Be sexcellent to each other” - Emma and Rachel

Consent Corner 1.21

by Emma Atkinson and Rachel Drake

Hello lovely readers, and Happy Pride Month 2021!  We hope it’s uplifting and joyous.  Of course antics, shenanigans, and other consensual mischief are always encouraged!  

Thinking of our own sense of pride, it occurred to us that we’re exceedingly proud of:  you.  Yup, you.  You believe in sex positivity (well, you’re reading this newsletter).  You want to know more about consent (and, you’re reading this column).  You want to be the best possible you (don’t we all?).  You rock!  

You’re amazing, and we think you ought to be reminded of it regularly.  Thank you for being a part of this super sexy community.

A little bird says the CSPC may be able to host some safe small-scale parties in the not too distant future.  Woohoo!  This same bird went on to ask us to remind you to please fill out the brief survey asking for your views on safe CSPC reopening practices.  You can find it here.

Are you huggable?  If so, we’re sending you consensual virtual hugs.  Yum!  Was that good for you, too?  

We love exploring the intricate jewel that is consent.  Thank you for joining us on the journey.  Praise and admiration can be sent to:  info@thecspc.org.

“Be excellent to each other” - Bill and Ted

“Be sexcellent to each other” - Emma and Rachel

CSPC Volunteers to Take Part in Consent Fest 2021

Consent Fest 2021

Where Will Consent Take You?

Presented by: The Consent Academy

Friday, June 18th: 3:00-9:00pm (Pacific) / 6:00pm-Midnight (Eastern)

It’s been 15 months since we gathered together to join in our annual celebration of Consent. Some things have changed dramatically; others feel like they’ve been standing still. The Consent Academy has been along for that ride and all its changes. Now, as people look to parties, gatherings, and getting back together, we want to focus on our important work...

Consent Fest 2021 is being held virtually on TwitchTV

https://www.twitch.tv/consentacademy

Featuring: short education segments, information about Consent, connection with Consent organizations, giveaways, and more. Join us at any point to see what’s going on, learn about Consent, ask questions, and celebrate with us. 

Subscribe to our newsletter for updates and announcements: https://forms.gle/FQUV6qBH1rpz6BfA9

Help us spread the Invitation and Consent Education: Share the website, let people know about Consent Fest, and talk about consent whenever you can. www.consentfest.com

For any questions, please email the Consent Academy at: theconsentacademy@gmail.com

www.consent.academy

Volunteer Position: Instagram Specialist

The Center for Sex Positive Culture welcomes everyone and encourages our members who identify as BIPOC or LGBTQ/SGL to apply for this volunteer position.

Summary:

Monitor the Center for Sex Positive Culture (CSPC) Instagram account on a daily basis. Create original content and post CSPC events on a regular basis. This position reports to the Communications Director and works closely with both the Communications Team and the Programming Team.

Responsibilities:

  • Monitor the CSPC Instagram account on a daily basis

  • Reply to comments, questions, and messages

  • Post CSPC events using the images and text copy provided or create your own images and adapt text from other CSPC sources

  • Create other posts from time to time to promote the mission of the CSPC and attract followers

  • Use the Instagram account to connect with organizations and individuals who align with our mission

  • Attend Communications Team Zoom meetings on a regular basis (currently 7-8pm PDT every second Monday)

Qualifications:

  • Membership with the CSPC

  • Completed Volunteer Orientation (can be done at the start of volunteering)

  • Familiarity with Instagram

  • Willingness to engage with others on social media

  • Competence using an image editor of your choosing (Gimp, Photoshop, etc)

Contact:

 The Center for Sex Positive Culture creates spaces to celebrate, develop, and explore sexuality and sensuality among a diverse, supportive community.

Ten Indications That You Might Be Masturbating Too Much

By Mistress 7, Inveterate Wanker

10.  For the sake of accuracy, you’ve permanently set your online status to “AFK - masturbating”

9. You’ve written an erotic novel in which all of the characters are disembodied hands

8. Your neighbors fasten breakables with earthquake straps due to the frequent tremors you cause in the area

7. A judge has ruled that your genitals are required to pay you at an overtime rate

6. You’ve started making videos of yourself wanking while watching videos of yourself wanking to videos of yourself wanking

5. “Lube and tissues” is a bigger slice of the budget pie chart than “food and shelter”

4. When reading, you feel the need to rub one out every time you come across a sexy article, such as  “the” or “a”

3. The extreme variety of your masturbatory vocalizations keeps accidentally summoning demons to our world

2. You have a backup generator dedicated to keeping your sex toys running during blackouts

1. Your masturbation habit leaves you insufficient time to write a decently funny article for a sex-positive newsletter

Note: This article is satire. Unless there is a medical reason to change your practices (i.e. your doctor advises it), I don’t really think that anybody reading this is masturbating too much, or too little. It’s completely your choice, and there is no shame associated with whatever amount of self-pleasure you feel is right for you. Happy International Masturbation Month!