Flowers' Garden: Overcoming Intimidation

By Flowers

CSPC parties can be a fantastic opportunity to explore your sexual desires and connect with like-minded individuals. However, for many people, the prospect of playing with someone who is physically attractive or intimidating can be daunting. You can get lost in the idea of, “Oh my gosh this person is so attractive, how do I deal with this anxiety?” Well, I am here to help! 

Here are some tips to help you overcome your intimidation and play with someone you find attractive at a kink party:

1: Focus on your desires. Remember that you are at the party to explore your kinks and desires. Don't let the presence of an attractive person distract you from your goals. Focus on what you want to experience, and seek out partners who can help fulfill those desires.

2: Practice self-care. It's natural to feel nervous or anxious when playing with someone you find attractive, but it's important to take care of yourself. Take breaks if you need them, communicate your needs to your partner, and prioritize your own safety and comfort.

3: Remember, they are just people. My biggest tip is to remember that everyone at parties is just a human. The CSPC doesn’t pull them out from behind the bar as a master of sexiness. They eat dinner, they have dreams and aspirations, and they also have people they find cute and intimidating. 

In conclusion, don't let the presence of attractive people at a kink party intimidate you. Focus on your own desires, communicate clearly, prioritize consent, and practice self-care. With these tips in mind, you can have a fulfilling and enjoyable kink scene with anyone, regardless of their physical appearance.

What Does Sex Positivity Mean to You?

Sex positivity can mean a lot of things to a lot of people. As a sex positive community, there can be many different beliefs and ideas on what sex positivity looks like. This is why we posed this question to our wonderful community on Instagram, which you can follow @the.cspc. 

Here are some of the amazing responses!

“Having the kind of sex you want to have, not the kind you don’t.”

“Hearing about how other people organize their sex lives and having nothing but joy for them.”

“Exploring ‘sex’ through sensuality (I am an asexual/Demi) kink dynamics really help.” 

“No judgment for kinks, or anyone’s past or present situation.”

“Being open and honest with yourself about what you want for your sex life.”

“Being able to make risk-aware choices for your sexual pleasure without stigma or concern.”

Thank you all for your incredible and honest responses, and thank you for being such a wonderful community!

I Choose My Adventures! How Group Camping as an Adult Changes Your Life

By Turtle

I close my eyes to open my mental scrapbook, reminiscing about all the varied and sundry camps I've attended over my lifetime. Initially, my dad is the oldest of five kids, all of us camping together as a family of ten at Lost Lake. I went on to 4-H Camp, Astronomy Club, my HS track team, Girl's State through the VFW program. I've even camped in the pig tack room at Grays Harbor County Fairgrounds and under the grandstands at the Puyallup State Fair. We think of camp as a place for kids in the summer.

As an adult, I discovered spiritual retreats, church camps, large outdoor activity camps, personal growth conferences in the woods, even one where no one spoke for four days. I worked at Camp Easter Seal too. (Now the slip-n-slide we had there was epic!) Camp Easter Seal was distinctly different from the Oregon Country Fair, which had greenish smoke drifting like fog through the grounds, LMAO.

Then, I joined the CSPC in 2010 and attended Paradise. In 2011, I volunteered. By 2012–2014, I was the entertainment lead for some 400 campers with a crew of ten. Sadly, Paradise was lost. 

Next, The Gathering was organized. I volunteered out there as well. LOL, I'm not sure I know how NOT to volunteer! In my family everyone helps with everything. It's what we do. Why am I sharing all this with you? Because many of my best memories happened at a camp. Ask me about being chased by a freshwater-lake shark some time.

I've learned an incredible amount about the world, about new topics, and I've expanded topics I'm familiar with. I've experienced deep personal growth, challenged my principles, met lifelong friends, and adopted new family members.

At The Frolic, you'll get the chance to experience both lighthearted moments and times when the world stands still. There are those late-night fireside talks that lead to deep-seated camaraderie and inside jokes. You'll build intimacy, trust, and bonds in ways you didn't know existed. 

Our community is unique in that we aren't just acquaintances who happen to know each other. We become an extended family that co-creates inclusive, non-judgmental experiences. We promote exploration and sexploration. Your journey of self discovery and confidence is endless.You'll stretch your cognitive and creative muscles and break out of stagnant routines. 

The Frolic allows you to expand your perspective. Create scenes you'd never consider. Maybe even enjoy new sensations. We have opportunities to experiment.

New people step up and exhibit leadership. We discover each other's hidden talents. By getting to truly know each other and set aside assumptions, we learn to respect each other. You will also see everyone just being human. Funny things happen. Laughter happens. Hugs and snuggles happen. Healing happens. People tap into their deeper purpose and learn to live their best life. They become more authentic to their hearts. 

Adult group camping is also the best type of self care. Being in nature is critical to our health, resting our brain matter.

Refilling our energy. Refocusing our priorities. 

All this and camp includes food, a place to camp, showers, rocking education, and awesome entertainment, plus play time with fantastic friends!

You won't want to go home.

Broaden Your Mind 4.6.23

Other Community Events to Enjoy!

The CSPC throws amazing parties and hosts many important discussions on various topics. But luckily, we live in a place where there are many more options to dive into sex-positive culture. The list below is just a sampling of some great events coming up in the next month.

April 7

Seattle Pups and Handlers: Meet and Sniff Social (free | in person)

Come be social during SEA-PAH's monthly Meet & Sniff!

https://seapah.com/public/schedule/events/48843-sea-pah-meet-sniff-social

April 9

Quink Social Club ($125+ | in person)

Quink social club is the premier all people of color kink event in Seattle and Portland.

https://www.pan-eros.org/event/quink-social-club-associated-event-2/?instance_id=5475

April 12

Sex Trivia  ($10–$20 | in person)

Bring your friends, grab a drink, and see how much you know about sex!

https://www.eventbrite.com/e/sex-trivia-optimism-brewing-tickets-586214261637

April 15

Sex-Positive World: Gender Affirming Intimacy  (free–$25 | online)

Let's discuss multiple ways to add more gender-affirming strategies for your own unique sexual practices, relationships, and self-perception.

https://www.sexpositiveworld.org/event-details/gender-affirming-intimacy

April 16

Sex-Positive World: The Pleasure Talk (free–$25 | online)

A talk for forming more safe and pleasurable connections. Online with sliding-scale ticket pricing.

https://www.sexpositiveworld.org/event-details/the-pleasure-talk-1-2

April 16

North End Makerspace: Be Gay, Make Stuff (free | in person)

A gathering for queer crafters!

https://www.eventbrite.com/e/be-gay-make-stuff-tickets-512080124437

April 17

Bloom Community: CNM Social Club ($5–$15 | online)

CNM folks unite! CNM Social Club is a place for polyamorous, swinger, open, relationship anarchist, and other Consensually Non-Monogamous (and CNM-curious!) folks to hang out and build community.

https://bl.ooo/m/cnm-seattle-apr-newsletter?r=eirikahdelaunay597

April 20

Consent Academy: Consent Basics (free–$25 | online)

Join for a conversation about the basics of consent, so you can start to practice consent more in your daily life. 

https://www.strangertickets.com/events/132427999/consent-basics

April 21–23

Seattle Erotic Art Festival (SEAF) ($20+ | in person)

Erotic art of every genre—visual, literary, performance, experiential—at Seattle Center’s Exhibition Hall. Join us for a smokin’ hot time!

Tickets: https://www.seattleerotic.org/the-festival/tickets/

Volunteer: https://www.seattleerotic.org/sponsors/get-involved/volunteer/

April 22 (ongoing)

Consent Academy: Consent in Leadership Series ($300–$500 | online)

An opportunity for leaders to deepen their understanding of consent, power, trauma, and accountability, consisting of 8 workshops and one optional lab, each exploring the knowledge, skills, and practices anyone who finds themselves in a position of influence or authority needs in order to foster a consensual space.

https://www.strangertickets.com/events/133352027/consent-and-leadership-series

April 22

Consent Academy: Sexuality, Boundaries, and Consent for Families ($25–$45 | online)

A two-hour class to prepare adults to talk about sexuality, boundaries, and consent with their kids.

https://www.strangertickets.com/events/136139132/sexuality-boundaries-and-consent-for-families

April 30

Consent Academy: Consent, Neurodiversity, & Kink ($20–$30 | online)

This discussion-focused workshop is designed to help folks of all neurotypes better understand and communicate with their neurodivergent partners and play partners.

https://www.strangertickets.com/events/134208918/consent-neurodiversity-kink-18

Community Matters: Price Increase and Possible Masking Policy Change

Event Ticket Price Increasing May 1–Introducing Tiered Pricing

The Board approved an increase in ticket prices for in-person events at the meeting on March 8. This is our first ticket price increase in over six years, while our costs for events have grown considerably with inflation. 

In order to keep CSPC events as accessible as possible while ensuring sustainability for the organization, we will be implementing a tiered pricing system. The three price tiers will be $25 for “discounted” tickets (the same as our current ticket price), $30 for “standard tickets,” and $35 for “benefactor” tickets. Members will self-select the price of their own tickets during registration beginning May 1. 

Is money tight? Choose the discounted ticket. Got enough for some small pleasures? Choose the standard ticket. This is the price most members will pay. Able to support your community by contributing a little more? Choose the benefactor ticket to help cover the gap for members who need discounted tickets. 

The CSPC is your community; your volunteer and financial support make all our services possible.

Considering a Change to the Masking Policy

As Washington State is planning to lift the masking requirements at medical facilities as of April 3, the CSPC Board is considering changing our masking policy from the current requirement of KN95 or N95 masking when not actively eating, drinking, or involved in a scene. The proposal under consideration is to make masking optional, though still strongly encouraged as a method of protecting ourselves and others from spreading Covid and other airborne illness. The CSPC will continue to provide free masks to those who wish to wear them in the event this change is adopted.

Please complete this four-question survey to share your thoughts on this proposal. We also invite community members to join us at a members-only Masking Policy Town Hall meeting via Zoom from 7-9 p.m. on Monday, April 3, to contribute your thoughts and ideas to the conversation. Time for each speaker will be limited to allow the largest number of participants possible to speak, so please be prepared to share your comments concisely. Register for the Masking Policy Town Hall here.
We are a community for our members, by our members–your voice matters as we make decisions that impact the future of the organization. The Board will be voting on this proposal at the April 12 Board Meeting for possible implementation as of June 1.

Special Events Takes Over April PPMT: Clowns & Claws RAWR!

Special Events is taking over PPMT in April to take your pervalicious fantasies out to play in the Big Top!

Clowns & Claws RAWR!

Where: Gallery Erato - 309 1st Ave S.

When: Saturday April 8, 2023 

Time: 7 p.m. new member orientation, 8 p.m. party!

Cost: $25

*Tickets must be purchased online, there are no door sales*

Have you ever walked by a clown and heard a deep, slow chuckle that simultaneously curled your toes and yet your inner squee goes, “Yum! Uh what?” A hand slips low in your hair along the base of your neck and squeezes just right. Your breath catches in your throat.

Clowns & Claws RAWR! feeds your inner primal needs found around the grounds of a circus. A whip-cracking lane for long whips and demos! A mat area for those primal-inclined animals with human bodies. (No shoes on the mats.) Wear your favorite costumes, furry ears/tails/paws; get creative with your costume’s theme! (NOTE: please no glitter or feathers or peanuts.) Surprise announcements to come! 

Please know that all play and members are welcome even if you do not participate in the theme. Come have fun and watch the rest of us trip the light fantastic as we skip on the yellow brick road to Wonderland. Yes, we mixed metaphors!

Sign up for that secret pleasure on the Pick-up Play Board and see who answers. This party caters to those lesser-known fetishes! Our staff wants to help you succeed, so please email ahead if you want to use the stage for a scene or set up a special setting! specialevents@thecspc.org 

Want to come? Purchase your tickets online! Tickets are only available through online purchase, we do not sell tickets at the door. Registration for this party is limited to a maximum of 140 tickets. 

Are you a current member of the CSPC? Purchase Your Tickets Here!

Not yet a member of the CSPC yet? Register for New Member Orientation and stay for the party! New member tickets ($35) include orientation, your first month’s membership, and entry to the party. Join us at the kinky circus!

Consent Corner 23.4

By Emma Atkinson 

Hello lovely readers! Welcome back to the corner where we’re all about the ins and outs of consent. Where consent discussions happen, you know that good times are likely to be in your future. 

We’ve been pondering Planned Parenthood’s FRIES model of consent. We’re now looking at the I in FRIES, and that means that good consent is Informed consent.

You’ve no doubt been advised in numerous contexts to know yourself. It’s good advice, and we’re echoing it here. Who are you? What satisfies you in body, mind, and spirit? What’s the meaning of life? No reason for that question, just curious. 

You’re also well advised to learn whatever you can about potential partners. Ask questions of those people and listen closely to their answers. Ask questions of people who know your potential partners too, and listen carefully to what they say. Put on your explorer hat and do your due diligence. 

Remember that unexpected and uncomfortable feelings can arise at any time. You have the right to pause any and all interactions when you need to—remember, that’s the Reversible part of the consent model. You may have gathered what you consider to be all relevant information and still be blindsided by unexpected and uncomfortable feelings. We’re human, stuff happens, and we get to figure it out. As a friend so aptly put it, it’s another fucking opportunity for growth. Yay, right? 

Homework: Have you determined the meaning of life? Please share it at: info@thecspc.org.

“Be excellent to each other.” —Bill and Ted

“Be sexcellent to each other.” —Emma

Get Involved! Join a Committee!

Can’t make it to as many parties as you would like? Unsure of how to contribute to the community? Join a committee! Help create the safe, fun, and sexy spaces we all know and love.

Special Events Committee

Next meeting: April 19 (third Wednesday of every month)

Time: 7 p.m. 

Contact: specialevents@thecspc.org

The Special Events Committee meets monthly to design and produce events outside of our regular recurring events such as one-off parties, holiday celebrations, parade participation, community outreach, and off-site events like The Frolic camping trip. Creativity and passion are a must! Please email with questions or for the link to our meeting room.

Accessibility Committee 

Next meeting: March 26 (fourth Sunday of every month)

Time: 6 p.m. 

Contact: tk@thecspc.com

The Accessibility Committee meets monthly to discuss goals, research issues, assess community needs, and then it works to create recommendations to the CSPC Board with equitable solutions for them to consider. Attention to detail and awareness of surroundings as well as a deep caring for the community are paramount! Please email with questions or for the link to our meeting room.

The Frolic is Coming!

SAVE THE DATE: August 15–20, 2023

In just a few short months, we will be hidden away with 150 of our closest friends. Soaking up the sunshine, absorbing new skills, cuddling and laughing by firelight among the trees…It’s The Frolic 2023! Bigger, better, and so bougie! The theme is Choose Your Own Adventure, so if you don’t like how your story is shaping up, turn the page and choose a different ending! 

A limited number of Early Bird tickets go on sale soon, so watch for the flares to light up your media. VIP yurts will be auctioned off as well and they are so WOW! There will be a hot tub, indoor dungeon, outdoor play space, and six days of fantastical community on our own private field of dreams! 

Stay tuned! 

frolic@thecspc.org